Zoners. The day has come. The first decklist I am going to share on TGZ. And, fittingly it is my own brew. Let's just call last week the soft opening of my new Pauper Commander series Paupularity Contest. Today is the grand opening! In this series we are going to look at a new decklist each time. My goal is showcase the awesome diversity, power, and fun of Pauper. And maybe, just maybe it'll be enough to get more people on board, because this format is so sweet. Every should really be playing it.
So, without further ado, let us begin. RELEASE THE DECKLIST!
COMMANDER:
Fire-Field Ogre
31 LANDS
Quicksand
Terramorphic Expanse
Evolving Wilds
Transguild Promenade
Rupture Spire
Dimir Guildgate
Rakdos Guildgate
Izzet Guildgate
Dimir Aqueduct
Rakdos Carnarium
Izzet Boilerworks
Esper Panorama
Jund Panorama
Grixis Panorama
Bojuka Bog
Halimar Depths
Remote Isle
Polluted Mire
Smoldering Crater
Lonely Sandbar
Barren Moor
Forgotten Cave
5 Island
3 Swamp
2 Mountain
10 ARTIFACTS
Darksteel Ingot
Prophetic Prism
Dimir Signet
Rakdos Signet
Izzet Signet
Mistvein Borderpost
Veinfire Borderpost
Pristine Talisman
Darksteel Pendant
Bonesplitter
Whispersilk Cloak
36 INSTANTS AND SORCERIES
Lab Rats
Strangling Soot
Rolling Thunder
Rock Slide
Siphon Life
Evincar's Justice
Firebolt
Fires of Undeath
Pyrotechnics
Death Denied
Logic Knot
Eyeblight's Ending
Muddle the Mixture
Mind Games
Memory Lapse
Ray of Command
Raven's Crime
Oona's Grace
Wrecking Ball
Blightning
Recoil
Soul Manipulation
Deep Analysis
Capsize
Jilt
Exclude
Compulsive Research
Terminate
Condescend
Shattering Pulse
Deny Reality
Mystical Teachings
Disturbed Burial
Merchant Scroll
Counterspell
Ashes to Ashes
22 CREATURES
Stinkweed Imp
Twisted Abomination
Faceless Butcher
Skinthinner
Macetail Hystrodon
Shoreline Ranger
Ingeous Pouncer
Izzet Chronarch
Mist Raven
Ninja of the Deep Hours
Sea-gate Oracle
Halimar Wavewatch
Steamcore Weird
Rathi Trapper
Bloodrite Invoker
Merfolk Looter
Thought Courier
Mulldrifter
Okiba-gang Shinobi
Gryff Vanguard
Aethersnipe
Ulamog's Crusher
Some Comments on the card choices: What fixing should I use? What's the land count? Why do I have so few threats? Where is all the card draw? Where is the discard? Why am I not playing card X? Chances are the answer to all of these questions is wrapped up in this: I change this list frequently. Sometimes I get up to 38 lands. Some times I play half a dozen equipment. Sometimes I don't use any counters. Sometimes I want Hymn to Tourach. Sometimes I only play cards that cantrip. Part of the fun of a singleton format is keeping things fresh. There simply isn't enough of a metagame to 'optimize' a deck list for any practical purpose. I play cards until I get tired of them, then switch 'em out for something I have been itching to try. I don't take this list as seriously as my regular Commander decks.
STRENGTHS
Ogre is the only option for a pure Grixis General so it is a more popular choice, but that's all relative. Pauper Commander is incredibly diverse and you're unlikely to be playing any mirror matches. Four power is the water mark for trading with all but the biggest creatures in the format. First Strike is an extremely relevant ability. It makes combat stressful and often requires some sort of team blocking to stop. Unearth is super sick on a general. You get to re-buy it every time you re-buy it. This will help you force through 21 pretty quickly. For decks that don't have enough removal Ogre will just become The Abyss as they are forced to chump every turn.
Grixis is a very powerful and attractive color combination. You get the best board sweepers in the format: Rolling Thunder and Evincar's Justice; All the counterspells, card draw, and removal you could ask for; and access to things like Ponder or Brainstorm that can fix draws and help shore up a three color mana base. You're also getting some cards that are just viciously annoying to play against: Stinkweed Imp, Raven's Crime, and Capsize. There is also potential to get very aggressive. A tempo-oriented deck full of bounce and pseudo-Nekrataals can often hamstring an opponent long enough to sneak in lethal damage. Ground stalls are also easy to solve with cards like Distortion Strike, Artful Dodge, and Falter. Exploit your access to fliers; they are pretty great.
WEAKNESSES
Ogre only has 2 toughness, which is pretty low. Basically any nonblack removal can nail it. White removal like Pacifism is particularly brutal. CMC 4 is in the middle of the road, so it is possible to fall behind early and get blanked late. You have to commit to building your deck towards one angle or the other. This card just isn't flexible enough to switch gears mid-game. Without the right fixing, 3 color decks can be problematic. To get the proper fixing, three color decks tend to be pretty slow; often needing ETB tapped lands or artifact mana to cast their spells.
Grixis is somewhat lacking in quality beaters. There is a lot of stuff with interactive ETB abilities or attached card advantage, but the reality is that these guys are smaller than the field. 4 Toughness is the bar you want to get over and there aren't too many creatures that get there. This list is playing very few creatures to begin with. Decks that have exhaustive amounts of superior threats or removal can leave you high and dry in the late game. Look out for threats that present multiple bodies as an answer to targeted removal: e.g. Maul Splicer from Green. Opposing Blue decks have the advantage of interacting favorably with our most powerful spells. Getting a Capsize or Disturbed Burial countered will be crippling.
OPPORTUNITIES
We want to square off against decks like Eternal Witness, Trostani's
Summoner, Jetting Glasskite, etc. Decks that present minimal disruption
and try to leverage late game plays, Buyback, or derpy threats are easy
pickings for the home team.
Ogre is well positioned against other midrange decks. This list is skewed toward late game control, letting us set up inevitability with a Buyback spell or game breaking recursion play. Also, decks that want to small ball the game will run straight into our powerful board sweepers. Voltron decks that pack bunches of equipment or auras are going to have a very tough time getting anything assembled. We simply have too many ways to interact and can put up road blocks every step of the way. We have answers to most things, it's just a question of what to get with Merchant Scroll or Teachings: Capsize is the usual target, but it doesn't solve everything. Oona's Grace will let you cycle into more action and more specific answers like Raven's Crime or a Cloak.
THREATS
Commanders we don't want to battle: Silver Knight, Calciderm, Duskmantle Guildmage, etc.
We really just don't want to see anyone who has more redundancy than us. Card advantage isn't that tough to deal with, but if they have enough threats that we have to trade ours off in combat then we could be in a bind. We don't really have enough duders to play that game. Too many counterspells means we won't be able to count on a Buyback spell or board sweeper to save us. Threats that are protected from our colors are super annoying to get rid of and are mostly unblockable. Also, decks that force us to discard a bunch or destroy our mana base can usually create an unwinnable position by locking us out of doing anything useful. This rarely happens, because people are scared to play mill in EDH (mostly because it is generally bad), but we are slow enough to actually get killed by mill decks that have sufficient board control.
Alrighty! That's all for today zoners. Let me know what you think about the article, the deck, the theory of relativity, or anything else that strikes your fancy in the comments.
Sunday, June 30, 2013
Saturday, June 29, 2013
The Stack #16: When Wizards of the Coast Lost the Boat...
Last week, I asked my fellow staff members to search the far corners of the Gatherer for the cards that made them sort of cock their head and go, "Huh?
Here's a few cards along the lines of our discussion today. So you can get acclimated to the weirdness, or whatever.
Anyway, consider yourself prepared. This is our Stack.
GRANDPA GROWTH'S PICK
Grandpa Growth- THUMBS DOWN
Oh yea. A green instant. And a Rare at that. Limited Edition Alpha ladies and gentlemen. Idea: We rename Natural Order to Natural Selection. Then we never speak about the card formerly known as Natural Selection.
Venser's Journalist- THUMBS WHAT???
What disturbs me more than this card's mechanics is the eagle-headed-tiger-man holding the red ball. Is he playing cricket?
Johnny Confidant- THUMBS DOWN
Odd card, wrong color, and interesting artwork. Granted that this card was created at the start of the game back before all that color theory and flavor was implemented it probably got played once and then was discarded from then on.
Now we have cards that fateseal, mill or even do this exact effect (Dimir Charm) that operate in both better flavor and theory. one thing is for sure, early years of magic were weird.
Uncle Landdrops- NO, I WILL NOT TASTE THAT APPLE, EAGLE MAN
This card feels like a bad trip. I don't even know if he's holding an apple. And if I want to shuffle my library, I will play Rampant Growth or Cultivate.
(GG: I always hoped it was a tomato. Possibly a killer tomato.)
UNCLE LANDDROPS' PICK
Uncle Landdrops- WHY?
I've actually re-written my response to this because I felt that swear words just weren't worth it for this card.
Instead, two things:
1) There's only one other Rigger creature.
2) Like this Rigger, he doesn't assemble Contraptions.
And three more things:
1) I feel like Chinese Democracy II is gonna come out before this card becomes relevant.
2) If an actual set of cards comes out that makes Steamflogger Boss relevant, I hope there's some guy in a forum that's all like, "Yes! Finally! I've been saving my playset of Steamflogger Bosses for years!"
3) I don't have a playset of this card, but I sure hope to God I'm not said person on said forum. What a nerd.
Johnny Confidant- FUTURE THUMBS UP
I listened to MaRo's podcast about the future sight block and they had quite a lot to say about this card and the "Contraption matters" function. The R&D team is probably kicking themselves over this card due to the fact that these cards were printed in theory of possible future mechanics. This card was conceived as a joke then got attention after being previewed.
Seeing as nothing creates contraptions and these cards come from the future, hopefully this actually turns out to be useful.
Grandpa Growth- THUMBS DOWN
Time Spiral block was a shallow grab for fans and revenue at a point where the game was suffering due to the general mediocrity of R&D. Listening to Aaron Forsythe talk about how poor TPF was as a limited format basically confirmed all my suspicions about how little foresight they have when it comes to design. On the surface this block had everything you would want: old cards you loved, classic ideas re-imagined for the modern game, and new things you haven't seen before. The execution, unfortunately, was so forced and so inelegant.
This card is an obivous plant made to get you excited about a future set and to stay with the game and keep buying packs. I don't feel that way when I see this card. I actually don't like goblins, steam-punk themes, or giant robots so this is a total miss for me. I have a feeling it is powerful though. Getting two of something when you only paid for one has historically been a great way to run away with a game.
Venser's Journalist- WHERE ARE MY THUMBS!!!
Not here at the moment, like those pesky Contraptions. They took a lunch break.
JOHNNY CONFIDANT'S PICK
Johnny Confidant- THUMBS DOWN
Some of the Fuse cards have good effects in combination, but this one's got a bit of a problem. Catch is an any permanent Threaten. Release is a sweet removal that works with what White does best, indiscriminate destruction. For 5URRW (9) you can steal a permanent, then everyone sacrifices one of each permanent rendering the benefit of stealing anything relatively moot.
Uncle Landdrops- Oh, Fuse Cards...
The silliest part about Catch and Release, aside from the fact that I get to make obscure references about Jennifer Garner straight-to-DVD releases, is the fact that most of the other Enemy Wedges seem to make sense. Red White and Blue never seem to find the right blend. I think Ruhan is probably the closest thing they've gotten to finding the right blend. And if you've seen this card, you know that's saying quite a bit.
Grandpa Growth - THUMBS DOWN
JC has a point, the halves of this card don't exactly create a 'combo'. To be fair that has been a thing with split cards in the past. There are several examples where the two disparate halves are useful in divergent situations. E.g. Spite//Malice. Fuse would seem to imply that we can use them together and should if able...but the Fuse is absurdly over-costed. Overall this card is just a giant joke. Maybe this is the Dragon's Maze version of Steamderper whatever thing.
Venser's Journalist- THUMBS DOWN
Overpriced and not even close to what an MTG rare should consist of.
VENSER'S JOURNALIST'S PICK
Grandpa Growth- THUMBS DOWN
I can't stand Rosewater's Squirrel fetish. What he makes up for with his writing quality he lacks in having cool ideas. Squirrels are represented as a 1/1 Green creature within the game. So are adult Elven druids WITH MAGICAL POWERS. This card furthers the ridiculous gap between mechanics and flavor by not only implying that a pack of squirrels can fight a Grizzly Bear, but that each additional squirrel moves it up an entire point on the P/T progression, which I assure you is non-linear. Ask yourself a flavor question: What should be bigger? 20 some-odd squirrels or the world-eating airborne alien squid monster.
Venser's Journalist- THUMBS TWIDDLING
I am thoroughly unimpressed with this angry mob of squirrels. I see them everyday on my way to work. They just aren't intimidating. So I don't see how a mob of squirrels is supposed to stop your opponent in his tracks. In EDH, forget running this guy. He has nowhere to go, except with the less than twenty other cards that produce/run off squirrels.
If only there was a legendary creature that revolved around squirrels...
Johnny Confidant- THUMBS DOWN
Here's a terrifying concept: Squirrels becoming the new Slivers... Yikes..
Uncle Landdrops- Squirrels Should Not Be Cards
I've always looked at Squirrels in Magic as the Unglued/Unhinged Creature that snuck its way into real R&D and no one seemed to care.
Still, I like the idea of Squirrel tokens. Any time we can put funny-named counters or silly creatures into play that aren't actual cards, I'm down- I just definitely don't think they should be actual cards.
But if they have to make a Squirrel on a card- It should be Secret Squirrel. Cause making Rocky means you'd have to make a Bullwinkle.
I guess this should have some message about how we don't like derpy cards.
I can't speak for my TGZ homies, but I don't really want them to stop making derpy cards as much as making sure that we don't end up with unuseful nonsense.
Okay. Stepping off the soapbox before it becomes another article.
Grandpa's got a really great Sunday lined up for us as he continues to talk about Pauper EDH. It's his first actual concrete deck list, so you'll want to see that. It's pretty cool.
Oh, and it looks like John Beard found your boat, WotC.
Here's to hoping you don't grow up, and we can be Toys R' Us kids forever.
-UL
 , |
| Wizards gives me neck problems sometimes too, cute puppy. |
| Why So Colorless-uh? |
| If you're not a Marine Biologist, or you didn't get a coveted middle school education, Starfish don't regenerate into friends they can hang out with. But this one does, apparently, and I do want to play it. |
| This had to have been a joke, and WotC must be laughing. I get it though- There just aren't enough Goats to go around. |
Anyway, consider yourself prepared. This is our Stack.
Oh yea. A green instant. And a Rare at that. Limited Edition Alpha ladies and gentlemen. Idea: We rename Natural Order to Natural Selection. Then we never speak about the card formerly known as Natural Selection.
Venser's Journalist- THUMBS WHAT???
What disturbs me more than this card's mechanics is the eagle-headed-tiger-man holding the red ball. Is he playing cricket?
Johnny Confidant- THUMBS DOWN
Odd card, wrong color, and interesting artwork. Granted that this card was created at the start of the game back before all that color theory and flavor was implemented it probably got played once and then was discarded from then on.
Now we have cards that fateseal, mill or even do this exact effect (Dimir Charm) that operate in both better flavor and theory. one thing is for sure, early years of magic were weird.
Uncle Landdrops- NO, I WILL NOT TASTE THAT APPLE, EAGLE MAN
This card feels like a bad trip. I don't even know if he's holding an apple. And if I want to shuffle my library, I will play Rampant Growth or Cultivate.
(GG: I always hoped it was a tomato. Possibly a killer tomato.)
UNCLE LANDDROPS' PICK
I've actually re-written my response to this because I felt that swear words just weren't worth it for this card.
Instead, two things:
1) There's only one other Rigger creature.
2) Like this Rigger, he doesn't assemble Contraptions.
And three more things:
1) I feel like Chinese Democracy II is gonna come out before this card becomes relevant.
2) If an actual set of cards comes out that makes Steamflogger Boss relevant, I hope there's some guy in a forum that's all like, "Yes! Finally! I've been saving my playset of Steamflogger Bosses for years!"
3) I don't have a playset of this card, but I sure hope to God I'm not said person on said forum. What a nerd.
Johnny Confidant- FUTURE THUMBS UP
I listened to MaRo's podcast about the future sight block and they had quite a lot to say about this card and the "Contraption matters" function. The R&D team is probably kicking themselves over this card due to the fact that these cards were printed in theory of possible future mechanics. This card was conceived as a joke then got attention after being previewed.
Seeing as nothing creates contraptions and these cards come from the future, hopefully this actually turns out to be useful.
Grandpa Growth- THUMBS DOWN
Time Spiral block was a shallow grab for fans and revenue at a point where the game was suffering due to the general mediocrity of R&D. Listening to Aaron Forsythe talk about how poor TPF was as a limited format basically confirmed all my suspicions about how little foresight they have when it comes to design. On the surface this block had everything you would want: old cards you loved, classic ideas re-imagined for the modern game, and new things you haven't seen before. The execution, unfortunately, was so forced and so inelegant.
This card is an obivous plant made to get you excited about a future set and to stay with the game and keep buying packs. I don't feel that way when I see this card. I actually don't like goblins, steam-punk themes, or giant robots so this is a total miss for me. I have a feeling it is powerful though. Getting two of something when you only paid for one has historically been a great way to run away with a game.
Venser's Journalist- WHERE ARE MY THUMBS!!!
Not here at the moment, like those pesky Contraptions. They took a lunch break.
Some of the Fuse cards have good effects in combination, but this one's got a bit of a problem. Catch is an any permanent Threaten. Release is a sweet removal that works with what White does best, indiscriminate destruction. For 5URRW (9) you can steal a permanent, then everyone sacrifices one of each permanent rendering the benefit of stealing anything relatively moot.
Uncle Landdrops- Oh, Fuse Cards...
The silliest part about Catch and Release, aside from the fact that I get to make obscure references about Jennifer Garner straight-to-DVD releases, is the fact that most of the other Enemy Wedges seem to make sense. Red White and Blue never seem to find the right blend. I think Ruhan is probably the closest thing they've gotten to finding the right blend. And if you've seen this card, you know that's saying quite a bit.
Grandpa Growth - THUMBS DOWN
JC has a point, the halves of this card don't exactly create a 'combo'. To be fair that has been a thing with split cards in the past. There are several examples where the two disparate halves are useful in divergent situations. E.g. Spite//Malice. Fuse would seem to imply that we can use them together and should if able...but the Fuse is absurdly over-costed. Overall this card is just a giant joke. Maybe this is the Dragon's Maze version of Steamderper whatever thing.
Venser's Journalist- THUMBS DOWN
Overpriced and not even close to what an MTG rare should consist of.
VENSER'S JOURNALIST'S PICK
I can't stand Rosewater's Squirrel fetish. What he makes up for with his writing quality he lacks in having cool ideas. Squirrels are represented as a 1/1 Green creature within the game. So are adult Elven druids WITH MAGICAL POWERS. This card furthers the ridiculous gap between mechanics and flavor by not only implying that a pack of squirrels can fight a Grizzly Bear, but that each additional squirrel moves it up an entire point on the P/T progression, which I assure you is non-linear. Ask yourself a flavor question: What should be bigger? 20 some-odd squirrels or the world-eating airborne alien squid monster.
Venser's Journalist- THUMBS TWIDDLING
I am thoroughly unimpressed with this angry mob of squirrels. I see them everyday on my way to work. They just aren't intimidating. So I don't see how a mob of squirrels is supposed to stop your opponent in his tracks. In EDH, forget running this guy. He has nowhere to go, except with the less than twenty other cards that produce/run off squirrels.
If only there was a legendary creature that revolved around squirrels...
 |
| ... AWWW DAMN!!! |
Johnny Confidant- THUMBS DOWN
Here's a terrifying concept: Squirrels becoming the new Slivers... Yikes..
Uncle Landdrops- Squirrels Should Not Be Cards
I've always looked at Squirrels in Magic as the Unglued/Unhinged Creature that snuck its way into real R&D and no one seemed to care.
Still, I like the idea of Squirrel tokens. Any time we can put funny-named counters or silly creatures into play that aren't actual cards, I'm down- I just definitely don't think they should be actual cards.
But if they have to make a Squirrel on a card- It should be Secret Squirrel. Cause making Rocky means you'd have to make a Bullwinkle.
I guess this should have some message about how we don't like derpy cards.
I can't speak for my TGZ homies, but I don't really want them to stop making derpy cards as much as making sure that we don't end up with unuseful nonsense.
Okay. Stepping off the soapbox before it becomes another article.
Grandpa's got a really great Sunday lined up for us as he continues to talk about Pauper EDH. It's his first actual concrete deck list, so you'll want to see that. It's pretty cool.
Oh, and it looks like John Beard found your boat, WotC.
 |
| Don't worry- A Wizard Husband and Wife can't be charged with the same crime. |
-UL
Thursday, June 27, 2013
EDH Tech: A Few Notions For Notion Thief
Today Zoners I bring you fun interactions with my good friend Notion Thief. I have put to the test 5 combinations in realistic scenarios that Notion Thief makes all the better (or Worse) for you.
Combo 1. Notion Thief + Teferi's Puzzle Box
This particular interaction leverages Hand Advantage in a brutal way. With both of these in play and during your opponents draw phase they will draw a card, then put all cards from their hand on the bottom of their library while you draw how many they put onto the bottom. The power of the Puzzle Box is increased by eliminating player's hands of answers, removal, lands and bombs.
In game this can be taken care of as soon as your opponent gets a chance to counter, or during their turn remove it with a sorcery. If you put Notion Thief out too soon he might get removed as well. This is where his "Flash" ability comes into play, playing Teferi's Puzzle Box out then saving lands or mana rocks to flash him in can cause some devastating effects that your opponent will watch out for in the future.
Obviously there is a drawback to this combination, either when it comes to your turn and you have no means to pop the Box back into your hand. (Blood Clock/Umbilicus, Master Transmuter, and Esperzoa to name a few) or your Notion Thief gets ironically stolen from you and you suffer the same pain you put your other players through, but the good news is that if you can't remove the Box you will cycle a hefty amount of cards from your hand to the library and draw just as much. I Strongly suggest Reliquary Tower.
Item 2. Notion Thief + Nin, The Pain Artist
This won't do what Nin can do with Stuffy Doll, but think of the benefits here- burning your opponent's creatures, then netting the card draw because of Notion Thief. As long as the said creature has no protection or hexproof creature removal for U/B/R with card draw is a real thing. Not to mention you have no limit besides your mana base on how many you draw seeing as what every you paid "x" for is draw.
Obviously adding 'punisher' cards for drawing or equipment to Nin to add to the effect such as Lifelink to gain life while you draw thats nice but let's keep this simple.
Item 3. Notion Thief + Forced Fruition
Rhystic Study? Please, This unholy union is the bee's knees, just don't get too carried away. First Damia then Jin-Gitaxias, and now this little combo all grant 7 or more cards in your hand but there is more to this than meets the eye.
Control is the name of the game here folks, and the key is the word "Cast" in the rules text of FF. Esper loves control and being responsive to plays. So here's how it works, Your opponent casts a spell, if NT is out you draw 7 and have an opportunity to Counter that spell assuming you draw one, but the other side of the coin is intimidation. If your playgroup knows what your deck does they may either remove FF, NT or just not play a spell unless extremely necessary.
The way i had fun with this combination specifically was with Psychosis Crawler, who for each spell i was netting 7 cards and spreading 7 hits of damage.
Be careful though, this combination is dangerous, if you come across a player that spams spells you can run out of cards soon, at 6cmc for FF to come out thats practically turn 6, and you have been though 12 or 13 cards if your playing multiplayer. 10 spells from then puts you at 82-83 cards due to the enchantments MUST ability. I'd run Elixir of Immortality or have Laboratory Manic.
Item 4. Notion Thief + Consecrated Sphinx
This, Is a dangerous union and it's actually something you have to watch out for.
Why? At first glance this would make for a great use of Notion Thief, hell I even got giddy at the idea of shutting down the Sphinx players fun. Upon second glance this is your death sentence because once your opponent nets that "... may draw two cards.", they will, but you will and the cycle goes forever until your dead.
The fact that C.Sphinx is so common in EDH makes playing Notion Thief a strategic play v.s. the combo piece that waits to be used. Save a kill spell or steal for this guy unless you want to draw yourself to death. Also a Switcheroo works great too.
Item 5. Notion Thief + "Discard & Draw" or "Windfall" Cards
Each Player discards their hand then draws, wait I'm sorry... I mean I draw my discarded cards, then for each of my opponents' cards they discarded *evil laugh* *get punched in the face*. Needless to say, this is a good way to make the table angry, (as if Teferi's Box isn't bad enough) just be sure to have a plan when you make the table loose their hand.
Other great choices like Arcane Denial, Burning Inquiry, Jace Beleren, or Oblation make themselves more appealing with Notion Thief to make Removal, Counters, Group Draw less beneficial, and more selfish after all, Dimir prides itself above all others for its knowledge.
Closing up here I'd like to say that all of these worked out amazing for me and my playgroup. Some, Like Teferi's Box, and Windfall made me target number one, while Forced Fruition and Nin made for more casual fun and in light combination made for fun interactions. It all comes down to your playgroup and what they enjoy playing against. Remeber, if your not having fun your not playing EDH right :).
Till next time Zoners, remember your Reliquary Tower and don't deck out unless you mean to!
Combo 1. Notion Thief + Teferi's Puzzle Box
In game this can be taken care of as soon as your opponent gets a chance to counter, or during their turn remove it with a sorcery. If you put Notion Thief out too soon he might get removed as well. This is where his "Flash" ability comes into play, playing Teferi's Puzzle Box out then saving lands or mana rocks to flash him in can cause some devastating effects that your opponent will watch out for in the future.
Obviously there is a drawback to this combination, either when it comes to your turn and you have no means to pop the Box back into your hand. (Blood Clock/Umbilicus, Master Transmuter, and Esperzoa to name a few) or your Notion Thief gets ironically stolen from you and you suffer the same pain you put your other players through, but the good news is that if you can't remove the Box you will cycle a hefty amount of cards from your hand to the library and draw just as much. I Strongly suggest Reliquary Tower.
Item 2. Notion Thief + Nin, The Pain Artist
Obviously adding 'punisher' cards for drawing or equipment to Nin to add to the effect such as Lifelink to gain life while you draw thats nice but let's keep this simple.
Item 3. Notion Thief + Forced Fruition
Control is the name of the game here folks, and the key is the word "Cast" in the rules text of FF. Esper loves control and being responsive to plays. So here's how it works, Your opponent casts a spell, if NT is out you draw 7 and have an opportunity to Counter that spell assuming you draw one, but the other side of the coin is intimidation. If your playgroup knows what your deck does they may either remove FF, NT or just not play a spell unless extremely necessary.
The way i had fun with this combination specifically was with Psychosis Crawler, who for each spell i was netting 7 cards and spreading 7 hits of damage.
Be careful though, this combination is dangerous, if you come across a player that spams spells you can run out of cards soon, at 6cmc for FF to come out thats practically turn 6, and you have been though 12 or 13 cards if your playing multiplayer. 10 spells from then puts you at 82-83 cards due to the enchantments MUST ability. I'd run Elixir of Immortality or have Laboratory Manic.
Item 4. Notion Thief + Consecrated Sphinx
Why? At first glance this would make for a great use of Notion Thief, hell I even got giddy at the idea of shutting down the Sphinx players fun. Upon second glance this is your death sentence because once your opponent nets that "... may draw two cards.", they will, but you will and the cycle goes forever until your dead.
The fact that C.Sphinx is so common in EDH makes playing Notion Thief a strategic play v.s. the combo piece that waits to be used. Save a kill spell or steal for this guy unless you want to draw yourself to death. Also a Switcheroo works great too.
Item 5. Notion Thief + "Discard & Draw" or "Windfall" Cards
Other great choices like Arcane Denial, Burning Inquiry, Jace Beleren, or Oblation make themselves more appealing with Notion Thief to make Removal, Counters, Group Draw less beneficial, and more selfish after all, Dimir prides itself above all others for its knowledge.
Closing up here I'd like to say that all of these worked out amazing for me and my playgroup. Some, Like Teferi's Box, and Windfall made me target number one, while Forced Fruition and Nin made for more casual fun and in light combination made for fun interactions. It all comes down to your playgroup and what they enjoy playing against. Remeber, if your not having fun your not playing EDH right :).
Till next time Zoners, remember your Reliquary Tower and don't deck out unless you mean to!
- Johnny C.
Tuesday, June 25, 2013
Spin It Into Myth #3- Results, and New Commanders
I've logged a lot of EDH miles since the last Spin article, so it's time to share some new tech and today feels like a good day to talk about it.
Anyway, let's get old business out of the way first...
The results are in, and thank god I'm not the father. Cause it has nothing to do with Paternity, which is good.
THE RESULTS- Old Cards
Reality Acid- No Bueno.
I didn't like this very much in Chisei. It was a dead draw for me in a few games. Since I've been asked about this card, and I just can't recommend it for really any deck. It's just a little too slow.
Magnetic Theft- Ended up taking this card out of my red decks really quick.
Not enough of a tempo changer. Also drew it when I would've rather had a land or something else.
Wicked Akuba- Really like this card, but outside of Spirit tribal- not worth your time. Hilarious and awesome to slam early in Mono-Black.
Cathars' Crusade- Play this card whenever you can.
Works the best with token spells like Increasing Devotion. One of the coolest enchantments out there.
Mindstorm Crown- Playing it Darien, but not so high on it.
I've yet to draw cards from it, mostly because Darien operates that way in the late.
Thespian's Stage- Play this card.
I love it. If you haven't got one, get a copy. They're dirt cheap right now.
Ritual of the Machine- I cut this card pretty quickly out of the failed Infernal Kirin deck. Going to try it again fairly soon in some upcoming projects.
Sakura-Tribe Scout- I Love this card.
If you play it, Fiona will Love you too. Play it in decks where you thought you wanted mana rocks.
NEW STUFF
This Spin installment actually has a little bit of a twist. We're going to talk about a few new Commanders I'm gonna be trying out too.
I'm going octopedal. The empress of the Cephalids may look like too specific of a metagame choice, but I promise you it's worth it.
I've begun to develop my own list for her based on a rather inspiring iteration I found on TappedOut, which uses the strange and almost unplayable cards like Glamerdye to change the colors on it while she's on the stack and impose on other colors while in play. Hint: She's also really good at messing around with Swords that can change their colors too.
Also, we have a "Creatures of the Ocean," theme, which basically means I'll be playing a bunch of hilariously bad creatures that might get me there, if all goes according to plan.
My current mono-Green deck is something I'm calling "Hipster Voltron," because it's housing a lot of cheap obscure equipments and a Jitte.
I've been wanting to make a deck around him for no particular reason other than the fact that I like this card.
So my current list has just a bunch of junk that I'd never actually played. It's kinda like a Pauper deck, but with the purest jank I could find. And a Jitte.
I'm pretty excited about my new Pauper Commander. Finally got around to making the deck.
It was surprising to find a decent amount of trickery to do with this guy. I'm looking forward to abusing Chant of the Skifsang and Narcolepsy as well as Bramble Elemental, which has a pretty cool interaction with SG's ability.
My efforts to find a lasting mono-Black deck have brought me to this old spellshaper's front door.
As part of the fun of this deck, I will be making the Wheel of Greel, per a previous statement I made about him in a list of my favorite Commanders so long ago.
I've been really into Discard outlets and free spells recently, because it's nice to turn bad cards into something useful. That's why I think this situation is pretty win-win. Even if I'm testing out jank, I can still use it to do something relevant.
Hopefully, it'll result in my playgroup playing Witchbane Orb and Imperial Mask, but no promises.
We'll see how it goes.
I know I'm making some pretty obscure decks, but if you guys have suggestions, questions, comments, or anything, lemme know what you think by leaving comments below or emailing me at unclelanddrops@gmail.com.
Johnny C's back Thursday, so tune in.
Till then, [insert random facts] into your daily life. And don't get girls pregnant.
-UL
Anyway, let's get old business out of the way first...
The results are in, and thank god I'm not the father. Cause it has nothing to do with Paternity, which is good.
THE RESULTS- Old Cards
Reality Acid- No Bueno.
I didn't like this very much in Chisei. It was a dead draw for me in a few games. Since I've been asked about this card, and I just can't recommend it for really any deck. It's just a little too slow.
Magnetic Theft- Ended up taking this card out of my red decks really quick.
Not enough of a tempo changer. Also drew it when I would've rather had a land or something else.
Wicked Akuba- Really like this card, but outside of Spirit tribal- not worth your time. Hilarious and awesome to slam early in Mono-Black.
Cathars' Crusade- Play this card whenever you can.
Works the best with token spells like Increasing Devotion. One of the coolest enchantments out there.
Mindstorm Crown- Playing it Darien, but not so high on it.
I've yet to draw cards from it, mostly because Darien operates that way in the late.
Thespian's Stage- Play this card.
I love it. If you haven't got one, get a copy. They're dirt cheap right now.
Ritual of the Machine- I cut this card pretty quickly out of the failed Infernal Kirin deck. Going to try it again fairly soon in some upcoming projects.
Sakura-Tribe Scout- I Love this card.
If you play it, Fiona will Love you too. Play it in decks where you thought you wanted mana rocks.
NEW STUFF
This Spin installment actually has a little bit of a twist. We're going to talk about a few new Commanders I'm gonna be trying out too.
I've begun to develop my own list for her based on a rather inspiring iteration I found on TappedOut, which uses the strange and almost unplayable cards like Glamerdye to change the colors on it while she's on the stack and impose on other colors while in play. Hint: She's also really good at messing around with Swords that can change their colors too.
Also, we have a "Creatures of the Ocean," theme, which basically means I'll be playing a bunch of hilariously bad creatures that might get me there, if all goes according to plan.
I've been wanting to make a deck around him for no particular reason other than the fact that I like this card.
So my current list has just a bunch of junk that I'd never actually played. It's kinda like a Pauper deck, but with the purest jank I could find. And a Jitte.
I'm pretty excited about my new Pauper Commander. Finally got around to making the deck.
It was surprising to find a decent amount of trickery to do with this guy. I'm looking forward to abusing Chant of the Skifsang and Narcolepsy as well as Bramble Elemental, which has a pretty cool interaction with SG's ability.
As part of the fun of this deck, I will be making the Wheel of Greel, per a previous statement I made about him in a list of my favorite Commanders so long ago.
I've been really into Discard outlets and free spells recently, because it's nice to turn bad cards into something useful. That's why I think this situation is pretty win-win. Even if I'm testing out jank, I can still use it to do something relevant.
Hopefully, it'll result in my playgroup playing Witchbane Orb and Imperial Mask, but no promises.
We'll see how it goes.
I know I'm making some pretty obscure decks, but if you guys have suggestions, questions, comments, or anything, lemme know what you think by leaving comments below or emailing me at unclelanddrops@gmail.com.
Johnny C's back Thursday, so tune in.
Till then, [insert random facts] into your daily life. And don't get girls pregnant.
-UL
Sunday, June 23, 2013
Paupularity Contest #1: The Underview
Hey Zoners, it's your old Grandpa Growth and I am here to bring you a brand new series where I talk exclusively about the Pauper variant(s) of Commander. Let's start by talking about rules.
100 card singleton. Only commons, except your Commander, which is an Uncommon creature card, but doesn't necessarily need to be legendary although it could be. I am mostly going to be talking about this variant. I like it because it gives you near infinite options to choose as your general, there are just a lot of competitive quality cards out there to build around. Other options are:
1. Using a regular commander (legendary creature, any rarity), but all common 99. I won't spend much time talking about this because you are going to have a lot of similarity to regular Commander decks. Or potentially just taking a decent Pauper deck and sticking an overplayed Commander at the top, e.g. Rhys, or Sharuum.
2. Playing with one of the actual common legendary creatures as your commander. This just doesn't really work out because there are so few. Unless you want to grind Ramirez mirrors for a couple years this just isn't a thing.
So the way I am going to run the paupularity contest is to show you a decklist, talk about card choices, and do your basic SWOT analysis. Today though, I am going to kick things off with an overview of some high profile cards you can expect to see floating around the format, the staples if you will.
The Ravnica bounce lands are excellent fixing and a source of card advantage. These, along with the new RTR block guild gates, represent a strong reason to play multicolor decks. Particularly Esper, Bant, and Jund.
Card advantage is a bit harder to come by in Pauper formats and you usually have to work harder to achieve it. Pack land destruction to deny your opponents access to mana and blow them out when they commit to a bounce land. Keep in mind that common LD shows up in Green, Black, Red, and Blue can use effects like Boomerang to stall their opponents development.
This card is the premier top-end threat in the format. It is enormous, often requiring double or triple blocking. It generates pure card advantage. It is colorless, so there is no reason not to bring it to the party every time. Investing this much mana into a creature can be difficult since the format tends to have a lower overall mana curve and games typically end through combat damage. Keep in mind that this is vulnerable to removal and a huge target for Threaten effects, so protect it accordingly. Keeping a Crusher crushing will end the game in short order.
Buyback spells are very difficult to deal with and stand alone atop the mountain of end game cards in the format. Consistent card advantage, raw power, and the promise of inevitability make most any buyback spell an auto-include. Do yourself a favor and look over the full selection of Buyback spells in Gatherer. Play the cards in your color and be aware of the cards in other colors so you will know what opposing decks have to work with.
Not all of these spells are created equal: Sprout Swarm is pretty much just straight up better than Lab Rats. Shattering Pulse isn't going to win the game, but you have to keep them all in mind. These cards show up a lot in Pauper Commander. The best ways to fight against them are counter spells, but sometimes you are going to have to get creative. Make targets illegal with your own removal or protection from color effects. Making targets illegal still counters the spell and denies your opponent the option of using attrition to beat you.
Evoke creatures present options. The power of choice has proven extremely valuable throughout the history of Magic. This is of the utmost importance in Pauper where versatility is at a minimum. Look for creatures with Evoke and Kicker, as they present threats with the benefit of added utility when necessary. The drifter, Ingot Chewer, and the newly minted (at common) Walker of the Grove will all be big time players. Look for creatures with these abilities as well as other things that give added value like Unearth.
This card is everywhere. Play it. Prepare for it. It is the best equipment in the format, which is really saying something. So many games revolve around creature combat. Simply being able to make your threats better than the opponent's is invaluable. In my opinion, you must play this, you must play Vulshok Morningstar, and you must play Whispersilk Cloak. There are several other common equipments that may be appropriate to any given deck, e.g. Opaline Bracers, but that is a choice you are going to have to make on your own.
Games of Pauper Commander tend to go late. Without overpowered threats to instantly close games, things tend to drag on. Having something to do with your mana is important in a board stall. In this case, a 5/5 First Strike is much better than a 1/1 blanker. Level up dudes are expensive and slow. They are also very much worth playing. Don't get left holding the bag on this one.
The story up to this point has been all about how to milk more value from your cards. I am happy to inform you that: we have more of the same. Retrace is insane. You don't need more than 9 lands ever, typically not more than 8. Any lands you draw after that are dead. Retrace can let you turn that into a tangible benefit. The newly common Siphon Life directly kills your opponent. Cenn's Enlistment advances your board. Oona's Grace cycles and makes every land you draw into a cycling land. Sick. Most of these are playable in regular Commander so there is no excuse for leaving them on the sidelines in Pauper.
While we are on the topic of late-game mana sinks: Activated abilities are good. It is hard to find better uses for your mana than the two-fer set of invoker cycles. These cards are nothing special at face value, but represent the promise of breaking the game once you have entered the big mana phase. Don't leave home without every one of these guys. The more colors the better; it just means you get to have more ways to use your mana in the late game than your opponent.
So long for now Zoners. Next time were going to dig right into the deck lists and start talking about how the format plays. We'll be getting things rolling with my very own Grixis brew. See you then!
-GG
100 card singleton. Only commons, except your Commander, which is an Uncommon creature card, but doesn't necessarily need to be legendary although it could be. I am mostly going to be talking about this variant. I like it because it gives you near infinite options to choose as your general, there are just a lot of competitive quality cards out there to build around. Other options are:
1. Using a regular commander (legendary creature, any rarity), but all common 99. I won't spend much time talking about this because you are going to have a lot of similarity to regular Commander decks. Or potentially just taking a decent Pauper deck and sticking an overplayed Commander at the top, e.g. Rhys, or Sharuum.
2. Playing with one of the actual common legendary creatures as your commander. This just doesn't really work out because there are so few. Unless you want to grind Ramirez mirrors for a couple years this just isn't a thing.
So the way I am going to run the paupularity contest is to show you a decklist, talk about card choices, and do your basic SWOT analysis. Today though, I am going to kick things off with an overview of some high profile cards you can expect to see floating around the format, the staples if you will.
Card advantage is a bit harder to come by in Pauper formats and you usually have to work harder to achieve it. Pack land destruction to deny your opponents access to mana and blow them out when they commit to a bounce land. Keep in mind that common LD shows up in Green, Black, Red, and Blue can use effects like Boomerang to stall their opponents development.
This card is the premier top-end threat in the format. It is enormous, often requiring double or triple blocking. It generates pure card advantage. It is colorless, so there is no reason not to bring it to the party every time. Investing this much mana into a creature can be difficult since the format tends to have a lower overall mana curve and games typically end through combat damage. Keep in mind that this is vulnerable to removal and a huge target for Threaten effects, so protect it accordingly. Keeping a Crusher crushing will end the game in short order.
Not all of these spells are created equal: Sprout Swarm is pretty much just straight up better than Lab Rats. Shattering Pulse isn't going to win the game, but you have to keep them all in mind. These cards show up a lot in Pauper Commander. The best ways to fight against them are counter spells, but sometimes you are going to have to get creative. Make targets illegal with your own removal or protection from color effects. Making targets illegal still counters the spell and denies your opponent the option of using attrition to beat you.
This card is everywhere. Play it. Prepare for it. It is the best equipment in the format, which is really saying something. So many games revolve around creature combat. Simply being able to make your threats better than the opponent's is invaluable. In my opinion, you must play this, you must play Vulshok Morningstar, and you must play Whispersilk Cloak. There are several other common equipments that may be appropriate to any given deck, e.g. Opaline Bracers, but that is a choice you are going to have to make on your own.
While we are on the topic of late-game mana sinks: Activated abilities are good. It is hard to find better uses for your mana than the two-fer set of invoker cycles. These cards are nothing special at face value, but represent the promise of breaking the game once you have entered the big mana phase. Don't leave home without every one of these guys. The more colors the better; it just means you get to have more ways to use your mana in the late game than your opponent.
So long for now Zoners. Next time were going to dig right into the deck lists and start talking about how the format plays. We'll be getting things rolling with my very own Grixis brew. See you then!
-GG
Saturday, June 22, 2013
The Stack #15: Apes, Reavers, "Breeders," and Puns
This past week our TGZ staff searched high and low for their picks, looking for the answer to one special question. Cue Video:
If you have to ask how, you're not ready. That's what it means to be cool.
In doing so, we found a great little installment of The Stack. Some great creatures with great titles, some great words for Pirates to say, and of course, an entire pick that goes into pun overload.
This one doesn't need much more of an intro though. Even the School of Rock's keyboardist Larry thinks it's cool enough.
(PHOTO OF LARRY WAS NOT COOL ENOUGH TO BE ON THIS ISSUE OF THE STACK. UL APOLOGIZES FOR THE INABILITY TO CONNECT YOU WITH HIS REFERENCE AT THIS TIME. WE HOPE THOUGH THAT YOU WERE AT LEAST CULTURALLY SAVVY ENOUGH TO GET THIS ONE. IF YOU WEREN'T, HE SINCERELY HOPES YOU FOUND THE MOST COMFORTABLE ROCK TO LIVE UNDER.)
Here's The Stack!!!
UNCLE LANDDROPS' PICK
Uncle Landdrops- TWO THUMBS UP (Like the Fonz)
First and Last names are just a thing when you're the bonafide MASTER BREEDER, makin' Thrulls all damn day. I really like this card a lot. I find it fun, hilarious, and he can do a lot of neat things. Imagine if we gave out titles like this to people in our everyday lives...
Johnny Confidant- THUMBS UP
I could see this guy making Babies all day to pitch to Blasting Station or supporting a kick-ass token deck like Ghave. One thing is for sure, this guys liniage is secure, i mean seven or more children? I kid but this guy is definatly the Goods.
Grandpa Growth- THUMBS UP
This is a card. And a deck. I occasionally get seduced by stuff like this, but not too often. This card is a big value engine and not to be underestimated. If they would just print a Green version...
Venser's Journalist- THUMBS UP
This guy is pretty sick, and his children are sick too. I once saw him in a Sek'Kuar deck, and he did more for the game than the general.
JOHNNY CONFIDANT'S PICK
Johnny Confidant- THUMBS UP
UL is right: First name, Last name with a title has a zing to it and my pal Momir is a Visionary. Mr. Vig triggers at any Blue or Green creature and that helps bring more creatures in to play. I've seen some monster decks with this guy at the helm, but he is just as strong within the deck as an asset. Either way, you cant lose with Momir Vig.
Grandpa Growth- THUMBS UP
Played a lot of this guy. So much. Too much, 'cept I can't get enough. Ravnica flavor was the nuts. It was the Coruscant of Magic and this guy was the Emperor Palpatine. Pouring out a 40 for my dead villian homies.
Uncle Landdrops- COOL COOL COOL
Momo's title as "Simic Visionary" isn't as cool-sounding to me as some other Legends I've seen, but he's still a pretty sweet card. I like his name better, actually.
It's rare to find a card that has a well-rounded coolness though. Like GG, I've played this card, and I talk about my iteration of this deck a lot because it's one of the first couple decks I made that helped to develop my theories and thoughts of deck design. I'm a huge fan of Simic stuff too.
Venser's Journalist- THUMBS UP
Although I've no experience with the Elf Wizard, I've seen him played a lot. Each time was a brutal ass-kicking. Not to mention the fact that his name is Momir and he's a Visionary.
GRANDPA GROWTH'S PICK
Grandpa Growth- PUNS UP
There ain't no sin and there ain't no virtue. There is just the puns you make.
Venser's Journalist- YOU'RE STEALING MY PUNDER
For a 4-drop, he's not bad. In fact, I like him way better than the Juggernaut.
Johnny Confidant- Nicely played GG
I'd pair this guy with Werebear, and let the game take a break from itself.
Uncle Landdrops- ....So Silent, You Can Hear a Pun Drop
....Coolness, I've always felt, is basically defined by the ability to let the thing or object create a context for itself. So GG, Gramps. I get it.
VENSER'S JOURNALIST'S PICK
Venser's Journalist- THUMBS UP
Just try saying this name in a thick scottish pirate accent and NOT smile...
Grandpa Growth-THUMBS DOWN
I always kind of wanted this to be legendary. I also hated the name until VJ told me how to jaw it properly. Final thought: I find your lack of puns disturbing.
Johnny Confidant- THUMBS UP
I find his name with the accent funny, but no GG I do not want him legendary...he'd be LegendScary.. HUH?? HUH?? I'll...I'll be quiet...
Uncle Landdrops- VJ's Theory Sound- Drogskol, Thumbs Down
"Reaver" is a sweet word here, and there are a lot of other cool things about this card, but if we're talking about "cool," Drogskol just sounds so ugly-sounding, even for this sort of Steampunk-looking ghost.
Also, I can't talk like that painting that sings the Spongebob Square Pants theme, but imagining him saying this does make me smile. So VJ's theory is correct. It is impossible not to smile at a Scottish Pirate saying, "Drogskol Reaver."
DROG-SKOL REA-VER,
DROG-SKOL REA-VER,
DROG-SKOLLLLL REA-VERRR!!!
(Jolly Pirate Laugh)
(Recorder Outro)
Be sure to check out GG's stuff tomorrow. He's starting a new article series called "Paupularity Contest," which is all about Pauper EDH. So if you don't know the 411 on this variant, Grandpa's here to educate.
Until then, don't be Squidward, don't say Sandy's full name, and just let Plankton have ONE Krabby Patty. I've always been upset when the Rabbit doesn't his Trix, or the little leprachaun was trying to hoard his Lucky Charms.It's just silly. Stop Hoarding.
-UL
If you have to ask how, you're not ready. That's what it means to be cool.
In doing so, we found a great little installment of The Stack. Some great creatures with great titles, some great words for Pirates to say, and of course, an entire pick that goes into pun overload.
This one doesn't need much more of an intro though. Even the School of Rock's keyboardist Larry thinks it's cool enough.
(PHOTO OF LARRY WAS NOT COOL ENOUGH TO BE ON THIS ISSUE OF THE STACK. UL APOLOGIZES FOR THE INABILITY TO CONNECT YOU WITH HIS REFERENCE AT THIS TIME. WE HOPE THOUGH THAT YOU WERE AT LEAST CULTURALLY SAVVY ENOUGH TO GET THIS ONE. IF YOU WEREN'T, HE SINCERELY HOPES YOU FOUND THE MOST COMFORTABLE ROCK TO LIVE UNDER.)
Here's The Stack!!!
UNCLE LANDDROPS' PICK
First and Last names are just a thing when you're the bonafide MASTER BREEDER, makin' Thrulls all damn day. I really like this card a lot. I find it fun, hilarious, and he can do a lot of neat things. Imagine if we gave out titles like this to people in our everyday lives...
Johnny Confidant- THUMBS UP
I could see this guy making Babies all day to pitch to Blasting Station or supporting a kick-ass token deck like Ghave. One thing is for sure, this guys liniage is secure, i mean seven or more children? I kid but this guy is definatly the Goods.
Grandpa Growth- THUMBS UP
This is a card. And a deck. I occasionally get seduced by stuff like this, but not too often. This card is a big value engine and not to be underestimated. If they would just print a Green version...
Venser's Journalist- THUMBS UP
This guy is pretty sick, and his children are sick too. I once saw him in a Sek'Kuar deck, and he did more for the game than the general.
UL is right: First name, Last name with a title has a zing to it and my pal Momir is a Visionary. Mr. Vig triggers at any Blue or Green creature and that helps bring more creatures in to play. I've seen some monster decks with this guy at the helm, but he is just as strong within the deck as an asset. Either way, you cant lose with Momir Vig.
Grandpa Growth- THUMBS UP
Played a lot of this guy. So much. Too much, 'cept I can't get enough. Ravnica flavor was the nuts. It was the Coruscant of Magic and this guy was the Emperor Palpatine. Pouring out a 40 for my dead villian homies.
Uncle Landdrops- COOL COOL COOL
Momo's title as "Simic Visionary" isn't as cool-sounding to me as some other Legends I've seen, but he's still a pretty sweet card. I like his name better, actually.
It's rare to find a card that has a well-rounded coolness though. Like GG, I've played this card, and I talk about my iteration of this deck a lot because it's one of the first couple decks I made that helped to develop my theories and thoughts of deck design. I'm a huge fan of Simic stuff too.
Venser's Journalist- THUMBS UP
Although I've no experience with the Elf Wizard, I've seen him played a lot. Each time was a brutal ass-kicking. Not to mention the fact that his name is Momir and he's a Visionary.
GRANDPA GROWTH'S PICK
There ain't no sin and there ain't no virtue. There is just the puns you make.
Venser's Journalist- YOU'RE STEALING MY PUNDER
For a 4-drop, he's not bad. In fact, I like him way better than the Juggernaut.
Johnny Confidant- Nicely played GG
I'd pair this guy with Werebear, and let the game take a break from itself.
Uncle Landdrops- ....So Silent, You Can Hear a Pun Drop
....Coolness, I've always felt, is basically defined by the ability to let the thing or object create a context for itself. So GG, Gramps. I get it.
VENSER'S JOURNALIST'S PICK
Just try saying this name in a thick scottish pirate accent and NOT smile...
Grandpa Growth-THUMBS DOWN
I always kind of wanted this to be legendary. I also hated the name until VJ told me how to jaw it properly. Final thought: I find your lack of puns disturbing.
Johnny Confidant- THUMBS UP
I find his name with the accent funny, but no GG I do not want him legendary...he'd be LegendScary.. HUH?? HUH?? I'll...I'll be quiet...
Uncle Landdrops- VJ's Theory Sound- Drogskol, Thumbs Down
"Reaver" is a sweet word here, and there are a lot of other cool things about this card, but if we're talking about "cool," Drogskol just sounds so ugly-sounding, even for this sort of Steampunk-looking ghost.
Also, I can't talk like that painting that sings the Spongebob Square Pants theme, but imagining him saying this does make me smile. So VJ's theory is correct. It is impossible not to smile at a Scottish Pirate saying, "Drogskol Reaver."
DROG-SKOL REA-VER,
DROG-SKOLLLLL REA-VERRR!!!
(Jolly Pirate Laugh)
(Recorder Outro)
Be sure to check out GG's stuff tomorrow. He's starting a new article series called "Paupularity Contest," which is all about Pauper EDH. So if you don't know the 411 on this variant, Grandpa's here to educate.
Until then, don't be Squidward, don't say Sandy's full name, and just let Plankton have ONE Krabby Patty. I've always been upset when the Rabbit doesn't his Trix, or the little leprachaun was trying to hoard his Lucky Charms.It's just silly. Stop Hoarding.
-UL
Thursday, June 20, 2013
Landdrops' Least Faves: 5 Cards I Don't Want To Play Against
Happy Thor's Day Zoners.
JC's off today, so you've got another dose of your Uncle again, and I've got some cards I want to talk about.
The title of this article does in fact say, "5 Cards I Don't Want To Play Against," but even that will warrant some clarification.
To me, the cards in the list I'll share with you soon are a lot like the way I feel about 80's metal band Def Leppard. Cause if I never have to hear the sappy riffs, crappy lyrics, and handicapped drumming in tunes like "Photograph," "Hysteria," or "Pour Some Sugar On Me," I'd be one happy dude.
I single out Def Leppard, but there are a lot of other bands and songs that I'd rather not listen to any more for one reason or another. Either way, I'm sick of it, and I'd rather just avoid it altogether.
Is it highly logical that I could walk into a store or watch TV or flip through the radio and hear any one of those boring 80s dinosaur tracks? Sure. There are always things beyond my control, and I have to accept that if I turn on a classic rock station and the mediocrity of Leppard or Foghat or Ratt or Van Halen just happens to be the next song in queue.
Still, I will do everything in my power to prevent listening to this nonsense, including leaving the store, turning off the TV, slamming something heavy into my radio, and if all else fails, the "Earmuffs" trick Vince Vaughn so wonderfully conditioned his children with in the movie Old School.
I think that pretty accurately describes my relationship. I get that these are cards in the game, most of them aren't ban-worthy, and that people play them. Heck I own or have owned some of them, even played with them, and I'll play against them if I have to. I just think we can play a much better game without them, and that's all I really care about.
So if you want to play these cards be warned- In response, I will blast some painfully awful music whilst we do it. I've heard Metallica at loud volumes can get even the most reluctant terrorists to come out of hiding. Your chances of getting Metallica though are pretty slim-to-none. It's probably going to be Cher-gaeton, a combination of Cher and Reggaeton.
Anyway, here's my list. Let's start with Dishonorable Mentions.
Blightsteel Colossus
I'm not so upset about this card. I get what it does, there are answers, and blah blah blah. I think this card is silly, and I don't see it a lot anymore because people get appropriately hated, and it creates preconceived plans around games that no one in our group is interested in. Cause although we might know what's in each other's decks, I'd much rather like to approach each game with a more opportunistic point of view versus having to attack someone because I know that if I don't, they're going to do the same thing they did last game, which is combo into Blightsteel. It's just not the kinds of games we remember, and it's not the ones that are interesting.
Mindslaver
I don't like this card, but I recognize its merit. Without Academy Ruins, it's one of the more difficult combos to pull off, so I get that. I also think that what the card does could be inherently fun if you wanted it to be. I like what this card does, just not what people actually do with it.
Iona, Shield of Emeria
I've done some busted nonsense with Iona. Back when I played 60 card magic, this chick was a blow out with Polymorph before Emrakoul. Like Blightsteel, she's got answers I guess. Still, not everyone can or should be playing Duplicant or Brittle Effigy or O-Stone or All is Dust in their decks. Sucks you have to build around her like that though.
5. Rhystic Study
Eff this card. A while back GG did a segment on cards he thought were particularly overplayed. To me, this is enemy number one.
Don't get me wrong. I love drawing cards. I do it all day, and I think there's definitely a place for this card. But it's NOT A STAPLE.
In fact, you're probably better off with Temple Bell, and definitely better off playing Consecrated Sphinx. Cause when the going gets tough, Rhystic Study doesn't get going. When someone's ready to go off, chances are they've already prepared to add an extra mana to the cost, and in a longer game like EDH, Stax is really super-irrelevant. Removal is everywhere, and even if I let you draw cards off Study in the early game, chances are the decks that play this card don't actually have the design necessary to make me pay for letting you do so. So if you won't stop playing it because I don't like it, maybe you should cut it for a Divination which you can time better to create tempo. That's what wins games.
4. Enter the Infinite
A friend of mine went off on this card in a 1v1 match against me a couple weeks ago. It was honestly the first time I'd played against this card, and seen it in a match. Overall, I just find it to be tiresome and boring. It turns decks into designs focused on trying to resolve this spell, and if that's what your deck does, make sure you have another deck to play next game. This card doesn't even secure an instant win a lot of the times, which is silly. Hopefully, you'll just be as bored as I am with this goofy combo.
3. Sorin Markov/Magister Sphinx
I'd hoped that maybe winning and losing to these cards might have people so bored that they'd try new things. However, in the past few months, I've seen these guys in action.
And let's be real right off the bat, Markovians- Unless you're super lucky, you're never playing either of his better abilities first.
Again, I get the reasoning. However, to me these cards signify a shortcut way for non-interactive players to continue to have little to no real meaningful interaction with other people. Cause if they're behind because they haven't done something all game, now all said player has to do is Diabolic Tutor for one of these and play it next turn.
Like I said. I get that people like these cards cause they keep you in the game. But wouldn't you just rather show up from the start, continuing to have ongoing interactions, versus not doing anything til Turn 6 or Turn 7, slamming one of these guys, and lame duck-ing your way to a lackluster victory? All wins are not created equal. The ones we work hardest for are the most fun. Neither of these cards are part of that paradigm.
2. Avacyn, Angel of Hope
I played this card for a little while, then ended up selling it because I was bored.
This is definitely a strong card made stronger by the upcoming rules changes. Now in multiplayer, people with Clones get to create Wrath-free board states, which makes this card almost "ban-able" when we consider what just happened with Trade Secrets. It's not collusion, but it's going to create ultramega stalemates that I'm not too fond of.
Stuff on the banned list often gets to be so because the RC doesn't like the way the game is then centered around a particular card. Prime Time, Grizzly-Bizzly, and Sundering Titan are all pretty decent examples of this. I predict this might be a thing for our brightest Helvault resident.
1. Exsanguinate
So many games are won on the back of this card now it's getting to be annoying. I played this card a lot when it first came out, and I have to say I am responsible for the reason it has infected my current playgroup.
Honestly, I'd much rather lose to Death to the Deathless (aka D to the D). It's a harder color combo to play anyway, and though it's absurd as a card, it makes a lot of sense.
I know being "bored" isn't exactly a reason to ban something, I just want people to take it out of their decks for a really long time, until I almost forget about it. Then you may play it again.
Till next time, practice drumming with one arm, start a fake fraternity, and for god's sake- don't let your friends play The Mimeoplasm.
-UL
JC's off today, so you've got another dose of your Uncle again, and I've got some cards I want to talk about.
The title of this article does in fact say, "5 Cards I Don't Want To Play Against," but even that will warrant some clarification.
To me, the cards in the list I'll share with you soon are a lot like the way I feel about 80's metal band Def Leppard. Cause if I never have to hear the sappy riffs, crappy lyrics, and handicapped drumming in tunes like "Photograph," "Hysteria," or "Pour Some Sugar On Me," I'd be one happy dude.
I single out Def Leppard, but there are a lot of other bands and songs that I'd rather not listen to any more for one reason or another. Either way, I'm sick of it, and I'd rather just avoid it altogether.
Is it highly logical that I could walk into a store or watch TV or flip through the radio and hear any one of those boring 80s dinosaur tracks? Sure. There are always things beyond my control, and I have to accept that if I turn on a classic rock station and the mediocrity of Leppard or Foghat or Ratt or Van Halen just happens to be the next song in queue.
Still, I will do everything in my power to prevent listening to this nonsense, including leaving the store, turning off the TV, slamming something heavy into my radio, and if all else fails, the "Earmuffs" trick Vince Vaughn so wonderfully conditioned his children with in the movie Old School.
 |
| Easily one of the best Movie Dads of All-Time. |
So if you want to play these cards be warned- In response, I will blast some painfully awful music whilst we do it. I've heard Metallica at loud volumes can get even the most reluctant terrorists to come out of hiding. Your chances of getting Metallica though are pretty slim-to-none. It's probably going to be Cher-gaeton, a combination of Cher and Reggaeton.
Anyway, here's my list. Let's start with Dishonorable Mentions.
Blightsteel Colossus
I'm not so upset about this card. I get what it does, there are answers, and blah blah blah. I think this card is silly, and I don't see it a lot anymore because people get appropriately hated, and it creates preconceived plans around games that no one in our group is interested in. Cause although we might know what's in each other's decks, I'd much rather like to approach each game with a more opportunistic point of view versus having to attack someone because I know that if I don't, they're going to do the same thing they did last game, which is combo into Blightsteel. It's just not the kinds of games we remember, and it's not the ones that are interesting.
Mindslaver
I don't like this card, but I recognize its merit. Without Academy Ruins, it's one of the more difficult combos to pull off, so I get that. I also think that what the card does could be inherently fun if you wanted it to be. I like what this card does, just not what people actually do with it.
Iona, Shield of Emeria
I've done some busted nonsense with Iona. Back when I played 60 card magic, this chick was a blow out with Polymorph before Emrakoul. Like Blightsteel, she's got answers I guess. Still, not everyone can or should be playing Duplicant or Brittle Effigy or O-Stone or All is Dust in their decks. Sucks you have to build around her like that though.
5. Rhystic Study
Eff this card. A while back GG did a segment on cards he thought were particularly overplayed. To me, this is enemy number one.
Don't get me wrong. I love drawing cards. I do it all day, and I think there's definitely a place for this card. But it's NOT A STAPLE.
In fact, you're probably better off with Temple Bell, and definitely better off playing Consecrated Sphinx. Cause when the going gets tough, Rhystic Study doesn't get going. When someone's ready to go off, chances are they've already prepared to add an extra mana to the cost, and in a longer game like EDH, Stax is really super-irrelevant. Removal is everywhere, and even if I let you draw cards off Study in the early game, chances are the decks that play this card don't actually have the design necessary to make me pay for letting you do so. So if you won't stop playing it because I don't like it, maybe you should cut it for a Divination which you can time better to create tempo. That's what wins games.
4. Enter the Infinite
A friend of mine went off on this card in a 1v1 match against me a couple weeks ago. It was honestly the first time I'd played against this card, and seen it in a match. Overall, I just find it to be tiresome and boring. It turns decks into designs focused on trying to resolve this spell, and if that's what your deck does, make sure you have another deck to play next game. This card doesn't even secure an instant win a lot of the times, which is silly. Hopefully, you'll just be as bored as I am with this goofy combo.
3. Sorin Markov/Magister Sphinx
I'd hoped that maybe winning and losing to these cards might have people so bored that they'd try new things. However, in the past few months, I've seen these guys in action.
And let's be real right off the bat, Markovians- Unless you're super lucky, you're never playing either of his better abilities first.
Again, I get the reasoning. However, to me these cards signify a shortcut way for non-interactive players to continue to have little to no real meaningful interaction with other people. Cause if they're behind because they haven't done something all game, now all said player has to do is Diabolic Tutor for one of these and play it next turn.
Like I said. I get that people like these cards cause they keep you in the game. But wouldn't you just rather show up from the start, continuing to have ongoing interactions, versus not doing anything til Turn 6 or Turn 7, slamming one of these guys, and lame duck-ing your way to a lackluster victory? All wins are not created equal. The ones we work hardest for are the most fun. Neither of these cards are part of that paradigm.
2. Avacyn, Angel of Hope
I played this card for a little while, then ended up selling it because I was bored.
This is definitely a strong card made stronger by the upcoming rules changes. Now in multiplayer, people with Clones get to create Wrath-free board states, which makes this card almost "ban-able" when we consider what just happened with Trade Secrets. It's not collusion, but it's going to create ultramega stalemates that I'm not too fond of.
Stuff on the banned list often gets to be so because the RC doesn't like the way the game is then centered around a particular card. Prime Time, Grizzly-Bizzly, and Sundering Titan are all pretty decent examples of this. I predict this might be a thing for our brightest Helvault resident.
1. Exsanguinate
So many games are won on the back of this card now it's getting to be annoying. I played this card a lot when it first came out, and I have to say I am responsible for the reason it has infected my current playgroup.
Honestly, I'd much rather lose to Death to the Deathless (aka D to the D). It's a harder color combo to play anyway, and though it's absurd as a card, it makes a lot of sense.
I know being "bored" isn't exactly a reason to ban something, I just want people to take it out of their decks for a really long time, until I almost forget about it. Then you may play it again.
Till next time, practice drumming with one arm, start a fake fraternity, and for god's sake- don't let your friends play The Mimeoplasm.
-UL
Tuesday, June 18, 2013
Better Know A Commander #1: Glissa, the Traitor
We've got a new series today. Like the ever popular Stephen Colbert segment, "Better Know A District," we're going go in-depth about Legendary Creatures, talking theory mostly, but also squeezing in some special niche tech that they might like.
Our first is my favorite Dollar General Commander, Glissa, the Traitor aka "Glissa T's."
HOW GOOD IS GLISSA?
Glissa T's is one of the best Commanders I've played with for many reasons.
The first is that she makes the game hard to navigate for your opponent. Combined, first strike and deathtouch really do appear "threatening" to an opponent, and it will surely deter a whole lot of combat.
However, it really isn't Glissa as much as it is the cards in your hand and graveyard that make her more terrifying. Being able to recur a lowly Wayfarer's Bauble doesn't seem like much, but in the context of the game, these things really add up. Combine it with the fact that there's already incentive to remove your opponent's creatures, and to quote Carl Weathers, "You've got a stew going!"
I know because I've tried all these things against GG's Glissa T's iteration, and basically, you're just casting one-ofs against stuff that's constantly getting re-casted.
Basically, it's just delaying the inevitable, and you're not actually going to stop Glissa from coming back for good, because casting her for 5 and 7 is still a lot of value-adding.
Overall, Glissa is a special breed of creature that your opponent can really be too happy or too upset about seeing on the battlefield, because when she's your Commander, there's always something they can do, but it's really only going to hurt them in the long run of the game.
SO HOW DOES SOMEONE BEAT A GLISSA DECK?
In my mind, there are four decent strategies:
1. Play Tempo
The best strategy is to out tempo the Glissa player. Use your cards when the timing is right versus responding immediately to a threat that may or may not be relevant. Split second cards like Krosan Grip and Sudden Spoiling are just as good against Glissa as they are in a Glissa deck. Haste is more optimal than protecting dudes, but both are good. So bring your greaves and make the game quick.
2. The Card Advantage Race
Trying to out card advantage Glissa can be pretty good. This is the kind of thing that a mono-blue deck would have to do because it's an even slower deck than Glissa, but it'd work pretty well, I think. Having a lot of answers and a few threats would be pretty key.
3. Constant Graveyard Hate
Ground Seal, Leyline of the Void, Rest In Peace, Relic of Progenitus- Pick what you want to play. There are tons of options. I know most people don't like playing stuff that might ruin their own graveyard abuse, so build around it. Practice around it.
Honestly, it doesn't even have to be as "constant" as I'm saying. Decks that hold up mana and can leverage singleton instants like Cremate or Suffer the Past well can definitely benefit from blanking Glissa's removal triggers.
4. Attrition to Combo
This is kind of like Tempo, but you're probably going infinite as a conclusion, so it doesn't matter if Glissa gets a few trinkets. It's a little more risky though, because you're trying to assemble combos. However, decks with tokens to lose like Oona, Endrek Sahr, Trostani, Darien- they can probably get you where you're going, cause they force Glissa Wraths.
Lavinia and Nin can shut Glissa down too, and they come in "Counterspell Blue."
WHAT ARE SOME GOOD CARDS TO PUT IN A GLISSA DECK?
Playing this in Dollar General means I've looked at a lot of relatively cheap nonsense. After all, we all know how good it is to have Swords that don't die, and Oblivion Stones whenever we want. So here's a short list of things I like in my Dollar General version.
ARTIFACTS
Razormane Masticore: Unlike the other Masticores, this guy's got a constant three-damage trigger on my draw step and a very relevant ability of first strike. If I can't afford to keep him, or I don't want to, he dies. When my opponent has dudes and I have artifacts though, I rarely lose what I'm pitching to keep him alive. So he's pretty good.
Bullwhip: This card is the butt of a few old CommanderCast jokes, and with good reason. It's pretty bad most of the time. HOWEVER, being able to force people to battle into Glissa T's is awesome, and when it's not doing that, my whip can kill tokens becoming my second Staff of Nin. Beware also when Vhati il-Dal comes out. It's actually been very good.
Sigil of Distinction: I realized pumping Glissa was pretty good when I won with Cranial Plating, so I said, "Why Not?" and threw the Sigil in haphazard, not expecting much. So far, it hasn't disappointed. I can make it as big as I want, which is quite sizable when I can play Krark-Clan Ironworks, cast it for 0, and remove dudes to net mana. Still not Cranial Plating, but I'm okay with that. Having pumps that scale to the game isn't the worst either.
Executioner's Capsule: Glissa T's most coveted "Egg." It's really an ugly little combo, I know. I just don't see any reason not to play it.
BLACK
Smallpox: When you out ramp people, especially with mana rocks, this card is insane value. I can't wait to play it in multiplayer. I'd been considering Innocent Blood for a few days, but I like this a lot better. All I gotta say is, "Get up, c'mon, get down with the sickness."
Snuff Out: I've been on a kick recently, trying to play relevant spells I can cast for free. It's a serious tempo changer, and it makes people think twice about what it means to be tapped out. I love it.
Sudden Spoiling: This card seriously changes combat, and there's nothing anyone can do about it. With Glissa, this is more than just a Fog. I can actually take out untargetable, indestructible guys and reap the rewards. It's one of the best cards in the deck.
GREEN
Glissa Sunseeker: Glissa 1, aka Sunny G, was more of a metagame choice. I'd been trying to get more removal packed into this deck, cause my 1-for-1's just weren't cutting it. After playing her in a couple games, I realized he's pretty great though. She's another outlet to blow up my Wellsprings, so I can even maximize value on my side of the board if need be.
Ulvenwald Tracker: I'd wanted a Guul Draz Assassin, but it wasn't worth the cap space in Dollar General. The next week Johnny Confidant reminded me I had this guy from my old Chorus EDH deck. Results have been mixed, but it's still a nice setup with Glissa. Very rattlesnake-ish. I'm also playing Prey Upon cause it's nice and cheap too.
LAND
Forbidden Orchard: It isn't really a secret that you can go infinite with this, Glissa T's, and Mindslaver, but it's still tech. Good players will try to not play dudes into Glissa if they have a feeling you don't have removal, so instead, I give them a guy I can kill. And I don't play Mindslaver, so people aren't too upset when it comes out.
Rogue's Passage: This is perhaps the biggest mistake WotC made. I've been abusing this card since it came out last fall, and I'm shocked I don't see it more in games. There's a point in most games where people stop taking Glissa damage, and it affords me the flexibility to decide whether I want them to take it or not. It's incredible.
Anyway, here's my whole list if you want to see it.
Green Eggs and Glissa
Also, if you want me to comment or help you with decks, you're welcome to friend me on TappedOut. I go by UncleLanddrops there (all one word).
You're also welcome to comment on my stuff too. There's a lot that I consider with my decks, but I'm happy to consider and re-consider. That's the process.
Till then, remember your training, don't buy that Magikarp, and I'll hopefully see you on Victory Road.
-UL
Sunday, June 16, 2013
Super Secret Sunday #20: The Father's Day Special
Hey Zoners! It has been a while but welcome back to another Super Secret Sunday. The place where we talk about underplayed cards, under the radar strategies, and under-thought thoughts. Today is Father's Day so naturally I'll be looking at some of my favorite fatherly cards.
Fun fact: I have never EVER seen this card. I mean, physically I have never seen a copy. Nor have I ever viewed a decklist with this guy as the Commander. Weird, huh? This has to fall solidly under the Under Utilized category of EDH Generals. If anybody submits a decklist featuring this card at the helm in the comments I will promise to write all about it in a future article.
It's not a big secret that I love Pauper. You know who else loves Pauper? Chris Davis, author and video contributor on ChannelFireball.com. Among Mr. Davis' notable accomplishments: developing the Ghost Dad deck. A deck which got its namesake from this card. Six Degrees of The Ghost Father.
I have seen this card in play a bunch. I am not sure why though, because it is pretty silly. This doesn't accomplish any of the things I want to be doing in my decks, but it is a nonbasic that comes into play untapped, so that is something, I guess.
This card is all value and super sweet. Even though it does give birth to a beast token, it doesn't really have much to do with fathers. Except, maybe, the sweet nicknames this card has. Swagtusk + The Thragfather = Swagfather. Or as I like to call it: Big Daddy Swagbucks.
The reason I include this card is also nickname related. This card has been called 'rampant growth on legs'. The legs in question here happen to be old and wrinkly. Hence he is the grandfather of growth. Grandpa Growth even sounds a little bit like Rampant Growth.
Well that is enough lighthearted theme nonsense. I'll be back next week with even more super secret tech!
Le GG's.
Well that is enough lighthearted theme nonsense. I'll be back next week with even more super secret tech!
Le GG's.
Saturday, June 15, 2013
The Stack #14: The Middle
Hey.
Don't write us off quite yet.
We're not gonna eat the world quite yet.
This week we decided to talk about the cards Goldilocks might've found in that third cup of porridge. Not too hot, not too cold, we think we've found some of the most lukewarm, mediocre cards there are in our own special sort of Mediocre-ist segment.
GRANDPA GROWTH'S PICK
Grandpa Growth- THUMBS ARE A WEIRD WAY TO EVALUATE MEDIOCRE THINGS
That is to say thumbs up/down is a binary system and we are specifically looking at things that fall between expectations of good and bad. Thus, rendering judgments with thumbs seems a bit unwieldy. I am going to think of it like this: thumbs up means it is appropriately mediocre. Thumbs down means I disagree.
I think this is mediocre mostly because of the expectations surrounding the card when it was printed. Gerrard was THE hero of the magic storyline for years leading up to the eventual conclusion in Invasion block. Being that I was still relatively young at the time, I had a lot of built up excitement to see what kind of uber-gross format-warping card he was going to be. Needless to say, I was let down. This is the rugged adventurer man who flew on an interdimensional airship to collect pieces of a super weapon to destroy the god of a living machine race. He kills Volrath. He kills Tsabo Tavoc. He watches Crovax fall to the dark side to become the new Evincar of Rath. He watches Mirri die. He watches Darigaaz die. He fights Urza in Yawgmoth's arena. The final casualty in the Brothers' War. He is just a regular guy and he squares off against the most powerful planeswalkers ever. AND HE WINS...In theory. This card doesn't exactly do him justice.
Venser's Journalist- BIG TOES DOWN
Assuming that you'll have tons of mana, your opponent will have tons of cards, AND you'll be attacking much with a 3/4 for 3WW, he can be good. The card itself is no game winner. Had Wizards made his mana cost 1 less and his ability cost two less, he wouldn't be half bad. Hell, if you gained one life for each card in YOUR hand he'd be alright (a more utilitarian Journal, if you will). I, however, have yet to appreciate Gerrard, awesome storyline aside.
Johnny Confidant- THUMBS UP
If your a fan of lore like GG is for this guy, then you're probably more disappointed than worried about its ability's. As far as a card goes, I can't even think of a situation where he would be useful in standard, or in EDH and the sad thing is there are commons that do more than he does.
Uncle Landdrops- THE MEDIOCRE-IST KID U KNOW
GG told me this was his pick a few weeks ago and we had quite a laugh. I find it's the perfect example. I can't think of a more mediocre card, really, and I tried. I went through Gatherer trolling random cards and came up with a few, but none compared. From a flavor perspective, it's tragically ironic. From a functional perspective, it's hilariously bad. It's perfect.
UNCLE LANDDROPS' PICK
Uncle Landdrops- THUMBS: ALSO A WEIRD WAY TO EVALUATE MEDIOCRE RINGS
I know people think this card is awesome because it's part of some serious EDH combos. I think it's the pits. When we combine, the score is middling.
The price tag on this card is "too damn high," which is why its mediocrity by most of the Magic Community is disguised. Even now, with p-dubs, I don't see a whole lot of room to explore with this guy. There just aren't a whole lot of abilities I'd want to replicate, even with fetches, Vorel, etc. "Ain't nobody got mana fuh dat."
Johnny Confidant- THUMBS!
I'll take illusionist's bracers over this, less hate, easier on the wallet and better in flavor. The flavor text insinuates that you're GOD! Why not, right?
Grandpa Growth- THUMBS DOWN
I have mixed feelings about this card. I wouldn't play things like this, but that is because of personal taste. I don't think this is an appropriate card to label as mediocre because it is so polarizing, both in terms of opinions and in gameplay. When you are going off with Rings, it feels unfair. When you are not going off, it is worse than having played nothing. That is inherently not mediocre. Comparisons to Illusionist's Bracers are fair. I like to file both the cards and hundreds more like them in the "Too Cute' Cabinet.
Venser's Journalist- THUMBS BAD, FIRE GOOD
I find everything about this card bizarre, especially the artwork. Not to mention the fact that in most cases, copying a spell is way better than copying an activated ability.
JOHNNY CONFIDANT'S PICK
Johnny Confidant- THUMBS UP
Putting Enchantments on lands is mostly a waste of mana. For three you could have Phyrexian arena, but for all intents and purposes, this is Phyrexian Arena that reads ''1, T, Pay 1 life: Draw a card''. I'll admit that it can be beneficial for decks that don't want to pay 1 life in a mandatory condition.
Although I don't think this should be a rare, if this were an uncommon I could see this being not so mediocre and just your above-average uncommon.
Uncle Landdrops- EWW
This is a card I was semi-excited about when Ravnica initially came out. I like having things to do, and I like to keep my mana open, so I thought, "Hey, I can make this card work!"
I was wrong. This card is horrible- and I almost never say that about things that say, "Draw a card." Debate about rarity aside, I think Underworld Connections is just bad. My disappointment will trump any objectivity, but I find it to be worse than mediocre. It's a Turn 4 Arena that now makes everything you might want to play cost one more mana, while also making it completely vulnerable to Strip Miners. Gross.
Grandpa Growth- THUMBS DOWN
I don't know if I could see this as an uncommon. The original was too high up the power curve. The fixed version is too low. It's more like the 'fixing' that happens to dogs as opposed to the fixing that occurs when your roof leaks.
Venser's Journalist- THUMBS UP
I wouldn't say that enchanting a land with the Connections is a waste of land; in fact I see it as doubly useful. If you already have a Phyrexian Arena in your EDH deck, why wouldn't you want an Underworld Connections as well? Card drawing is a necessity in most blue and black decks, and I say, more power to the neutered Phyrexian Arena!
VENSER'S JOURNALIST'S PICK
Venser's Journalist- THUMBS SIDEWAYS
It's a 2 drop 2/2, no abilities, no nothing. In essence, this is the definition of mediocre, since it's got a power/toughness that you'd expect for a 2-drop and it brings nothing else to the table. It's not terrible because it has a reasonable cost for what it does; but, it's definitely no guildmage/something awesome like that.
Johnny Confidant- THUMBS UP
This takes me back to when I used to mob the field with Lions, Tigers, and Bears for little more than 2 mana during my first month of Magic. The first time I ever played magic I wanted the best creatures that I could get out for the least amount of mana and these 2 cmc guys were my go-to's.
Uncle Landdrops- NO CIGAR, BUT CLOSE
Many people consider this a mediocre card. I can't. Maybe it's because my curve is skewed a little towards EDH, where "ain't nobody got time fuh dat," but I think he's one keyword from this place. When I first started playing Magic, I might've agreed. A lot has changed since Alara block though, and I think it'd have to have Vigilance or Shroud to carry its weight now.
Grandpa Growth- THUMBS UP
I have had a pretty long history with bears. I was there when people started calling things bears. When I first began playing Magic this was actually a pretty good two drop. Heck, Ironclaw Orcs won a pro tour. This guy is just OP. Back then the game was simpler. Games revolved around who had the better spells, not the better strategy. Card availability was a real issue (although we hadn't started calling it that yet) and without the internet you'd never even see half the cards in a set. Serra Angel was the best creature. Necropotence was legal...and "bad". Creatures who had power equal to their converted mana cost were strong. I remember wishing for a vanilla 5/5 for five and thinking it'd never see print because it was too good.
Do you agree with us? Do you think we're too silly? Don't be afraid to let us know what you think about our assessments on The Stack!
Stay tuned for GG's all-new Super Secret Sunday tomorrow, and if you're a Dad, Happy Father's Day, and I'm terribly sorry for you. Till next time.
-UL
Don't write us off quite yet.
We're not gonna eat the world quite yet.
This week we decided to talk about the cards Goldilocks might've found in that third cup of porridge. Not too hot, not too cold, we think we've found some of the most lukewarm, mediocre cards there are in our own special sort of Mediocre-ist segment.
GRANDPA GROWTH'S PICK
That is to say thumbs up/down is a binary system and we are specifically looking at things that fall between expectations of good and bad. Thus, rendering judgments with thumbs seems a bit unwieldy. I am going to think of it like this: thumbs up means it is appropriately mediocre. Thumbs down means I disagree.
I think this is mediocre mostly because of the expectations surrounding the card when it was printed. Gerrard was THE hero of the magic storyline for years leading up to the eventual conclusion in Invasion block. Being that I was still relatively young at the time, I had a lot of built up excitement to see what kind of uber-gross format-warping card he was going to be. Needless to say, I was let down. This is the rugged adventurer man who flew on an interdimensional airship to collect pieces of a super weapon to destroy the god of a living machine race. He kills Volrath. He kills Tsabo Tavoc. He watches Crovax fall to the dark side to become the new Evincar of Rath. He watches Mirri die. He watches Darigaaz die. He fights Urza in Yawgmoth's arena. The final casualty in the Brothers' War. He is just a regular guy and he squares off against the most powerful planeswalkers ever. AND HE WINS...In theory. This card doesn't exactly do him justice.
Venser's Journalist- BIG TOES DOWN
Assuming that you'll have tons of mana, your opponent will have tons of cards, AND you'll be attacking much with a 3/4 for 3WW, he can be good. The card itself is no game winner. Had Wizards made his mana cost 1 less and his ability cost two less, he wouldn't be half bad. Hell, if you gained one life for each card in YOUR hand he'd be alright (a more utilitarian Journal, if you will). I, however, have yet to appreciate Gerrard, awesome storyline aside.
Johnny Confidant- THUMBS UP
If your a fan of lore like GG is for this guy, then you're probably more disappointed than worried about its ability's. As far as a card goes, I can't even think of a situation where he would be useful in standard, or in EDH and the sad thing is there are commons that do more than he does.
Uncle Landdrops- THE MEDIOCRE-IST KID U KNOW
GG told me this was his pick a few weeks ago and we had quite a laugh. I find it's the perfect example. I can't think of a more mediocre card, really, and I tried. I went through Gatherer trolling random cards and came up with a few, but none compared. From a flavor perspective, it's tragically ironic. From a functional perspective, it's hilariously bad. It's perfect.
UNCLE LANDDROPS' PICK
I know people think this card is awesome because it's part of some serious EDH combos. I think it's the pits. When we combine, the score is middling.
The price tag on this card is "too damn high," which is why its mediocrity by most of the Magic Community is disguised. Even now, with p-dubs, I don't see a whole lot of room to explore with this guy. There just aren't a whole lot of abilities I'd want to replicate, even with fetches, Vorel, etc. "Ain't nobody got mana fuh dat."
Johnny Confidant- THUMBS!
I'll take illusionist's bracers over this, less hate, easier on the wallet and better in flavor. The flavor text insinuates that you're GOD! Why not, right?
Grandpa Growth- THUMBS DOWN
I have mixed feelings about this card. I wouldn't play things like this, but that is because of personal taste. I don't think this is an appropriate card to label as mediocre because it is so polarizing, both in terms of opinions and in gameplay. When you are going off with Rings, it feels unfair. When you are not going off, it is worse than having played nothing. That is inherently not mediocre. Comparisons to Illusionist's Bracers are fair. I like to file both the cards and hundreds more like them in the "Too Cute' Cabinet.
Venser's Journalist- THUMBS BAD, FIRE GOOD
I find everything about this card bizarre, especially the artwork. Not to mention the fact that in most cases, copying a spell is way better than copying an activated ability.
Putting Enchantments on lands is mostly a waste of mana. For three you could have Phyrexian arena, but for all intents and purposes, this is Phyrexian Arena that reads ''1, T, Pay 1 life: Draw a card''. I'll admit that it can be beneficial for decks that don't want to pay 1 life in a mandatory condition.
Although I don't think this should be a rare, if this were an uncommon I could see this being not so mediocre and just your above-average uncommon.
Uncle Landdrops- EWW
This is a card I was semi-excited about when Ravnica initially came out. I like having things to do, and I like to keep my mana open, so I thought, "Hey, I can make this card work!"
I was wrong. This card is horrible- and I almost never say that about things that say, "Draw a card." Debate about rarity aside, I think Underworld Connections is just bad. My disappointment will trump any objectivity, but I find it to be worse than mediocre. It's a Turn 4 Arena that now makes everything you might want to play cost one more mana, while also making it completely vulnerable to Strip Miners. Gross.
Grandpa Growth- THUMBS DOWN
I don't know if I could see this as an uncommon. The original was too high up the power curve. The fixed version is too low. It's more like the 'fixing' that happens to dogs as opposed to the fixing that occurs when your roof leaks.
Venser's Journalist- THUMBS UP
I wouldn't say that enchanting a land with the Connections is a waste of land; in fact I see it as doubly useful. If you already have a Phyrexian Arena in your EDH deck, why wouldn't you want an Underworld Connections as well? Card drawing is a necessity in most blue and black decks, and I say, more power to the neutered Phyrexian Arena!
VENSER'S JOURNALIST'S PICK
It's a 2 drop 2/2, no abilities, no nothing. In essence, this is the definition of mediocre, since it's got a power/toughness that you'd expect for a 2-drop and it brings nothing else to the table. It's not terrible because it has a reasonable cost for what it does; but, it's definitely no guildmage/something awesome like that.
Johnny Confidant- THUMBS UP
This takes me back to when I used to mob the field with Lions, Tigers, and Bears for little more than 2 mana during my first month of Magic. The first time I ever played magic I wanted the best creatures that I could get out for the least amount of mana and these 2 cmc guys were my go-to's.
Uncle Landdrops- NO CIGAR, BUT CLOSE
Many people consider this a mediocre card. I can't. Maybe it's because my curve is skewed a little towards EDH, where "ain't nobody got time fuh dat," but I think he's one keyword from this place. When I first started playing Magic, I might've agreed. A lot has changed since Alara block though, and I think it'd have to have Vigilance or Shroud to carry its weight now.
Grandpa Growth- THUMBS UP
I have had a pretty long history with bears. I was there when people started calling things bears. When I first began playing Magic this was actually a pretty good two drop. Heck, Ironclaw Orcs won a pro tour. This guy is just OP. Back then the game was simpler. Games revolved around who had the better spells, not the better strategy. Card availability was a real issue (although we hadn't started calling it that yet) and without the internet you'd never even see half the cards in a set. Serra Angel was the best creature. Necropotence was legal...and "bad". Creatures who had power equal to their converted mana cost were strong. I remember wishing for a vanilla 5/5 for five and thinking it'd never see print because it was too good.
Do you agree with us? Do you think we're too silly? Don't be afraid to let us know what you think about our assessments on The Stack!
Stay tuned for GG's all-new Super Secret Sunday tomorrow, and if you're a Dad, Happy Father's Day, and I'm terribly sorry for you. Till next time.
-UL
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