UL's Non-Green Ramp, Black Artifact Hate, and Card Draw

There's always some reasons to be mad at the Color Pie, or lack thereof these days.

For now, let's be optimistic.

Over the past year or so, I've been scrounging up some "less elegant" tech and testing it out at the table with quite a bit of success. What I mean by that is we're not just gonna use the age-old artifact cop-out. There's a bunch of nice artifacts running around these days, like Steel Hellkite and the like- but we're not going there today.

What I've got to share here is some of the coolest, most burning-hot alternatives to off-color tactics you could ever see. Sure, you might say it's a little "too cute," that's fine. Just remember how boring and unoriginal you'll sound later when you're casting Enter the Infinite or whatever crazy-annoying blue spell you kids are playing these days.

The biggest thing I've been testing out is what I call non-green ramp, although that's probably not the best term for what I'm actually talking about. Aside from the Solemn Simulacrum that should be in every one of your decks (cause most of mine have one), there's actually some neat non-artifact ways to cheat the color pie and get land in your hand so you don't miss land drops.

In terms of the Color Pie, White and Green have it pretty easy. Land Tax, Tithe, Weathered Wayfarer, Gift of Estates, and Endless Horizons are all nice pieces of card advantages for Plains players. Green, for the most part, has everything else- Cultivate, Koko Baby, Grandpa Growth- you name it. They can find it.

But I bet you didn't know that outside of Dark Lili and her Shade that there were nice black cards that could help you.

Infernal Tutor's one of my new faves in this department, cause it's pretty funny, being very counter-intuitive to the 1-ofs rule in EDH. But basic lands are good and if you play a lot of them, this card should be great. Having a bad ramp spell for Turn 2 seems better than the alternative, which is no lands for Turn 3 or 4. And I hear mono-black players complain about this all the time. Myself included. The best part about Infernal Tootz though is that in the late-late top-deck game, this card becomes a real Diabolic Tutor. So if you're scratching your head and all upset cause you had to waste your Demonic/Vampiric Tutor on a land, well, now you've got a nice addition to your tutoring family, and you can get yourself some land too.

For all intensive purposes, Tainted Pact is probably the better option than Infernal. It's an instant that you can use without having a land, and one that allows you to dig until you find something useful or you draw into another land. Either way, you're getting a card that you want. I've had a lot of success with this card, and I don't mind digging for actual answers at the cost of losing a few cards. I also play the doctor-recommended 40 lands, so I won't lose much if I make a mistake. Just make sure your deck has good design with multiple answers, and this card will never really bite you in the butt.This card takes a little skill, but that's what makes it good, in my opinion.

Sol Ring and Top aren't the only thing this guy can go get you. I've actually grown quite fond of Trinket Mage. I use him to get all kinds of stuff, from Skullclamp to Brittle Effigy to- LANDS?!?!?!?!?

Yeah, this is real folks. Trinket Mage can be your metal answer to Borderland Ranger, so long's the price is right.

I discovered this hot, nasty, badass tech one day when I'd Mimic Vatted ol' Trinky-Dink to oblivion, and I needed one more target. And I got it.

Artificer's Intuition and Tezzeret the Seeker are also really nice ways to Artifact Land Ramp. See also Reshape and your favorite waste of time, Arcum Dagsson himself. Aside from Tezzy, be prepared to sacrifice something else for any of the others though.

Speaking of Artifacts, one of the biggest problems I also experience is being able to deal with them in Mono-Black. But I've got some tricks, and though I haven't tried them out, I've seen people playing these in various lists on the interweb. So it must be a thing.

Gate to Phyrexia is probably one of the worst ways to get rid of artifacts, cause there's only one point in time when you can do it, and it comes at the cost of a creature's life. With Bitterblossom and Endrek Sahr, the latter part isn't so bad, but still. Not my favorite pick. And because it's from Antiquities and Master's Edition, it's actually more expensive to purchase. But worth it? I guess. If you're a hardass, and you love older cards.

This is another steep cost to play, so is it worth it? Possibly. Again, Endrek Sahr's probably your general, or you just play Ghave tokens or something comparable.

Still, you have to admire the fact that a card exists in black and it says, "Destroy target artifact."

Better be a good artifact-otherwise, you're just better off playing Braids and hoping for a misplay of some kind.

He's all like, "Ooh, dat scary doe!"

The last of black artifact beatings, and possibly the best option, is definitely the goofiest. Finding these points on a Magic card continuum is indeed rare, so I'd like share with you guys this moment of fun-victory, as it is achieved this day. I feel like Thor at the beginning of the movie, when he's just all drunk and eating food and being awesome cause he's trying to beat up Frost Giants.

Anyway, Xenic Poltergeist. This card is crazy-goofy, sure, yet so relevant. With black, there's probably a good chance you're packing Doom Blades and Murders. Well, this is the best chance you've got of being able to find instant speed answers. still slow, but if it's on the board, your opponent will have to think about playing into it. The best part is you can turn something instantly, and remove it just as quick.

Also, with Poltergeist now being Spirit, it becomes totally relevant for any other people who share my passion for mono-B Spirit tribal.

I've talked a lot about Blue and Black stuff, so let's shift gears a little bit here.

The color White really has no weaknesses, outside of its ability to draw cards. You can get land. You can Wrath. You can dance if you want to, or you can leave your friends behind. I don't know. Maybe your friends don't dance.

Whatever the case, here are a few cards that I've played to help with the card draw problem.

This is a card I decided to try out in Kiyomaro because I got caught in the middle of a Peer Pressure Sandwich.

I first heard about it on CommanderCast, and, although I remember thinking that the guy explaining it was saying why it was good in a wrong way, I felt like this was a card I could play.

Then GG mentioned it as sort of a cantrip for white, which I thought might be useful. Being able to replace itself is nice, so there's no loss if I decide to play it.

Also, I've hit some sweet rips off this card. Believe me when I say it's relevant, and a nice addition. Don't play it early for just the card though. This is easily a turn 6 or 7 card, and should be considered as such.

I've taken this card out of other decks, so I am aware of how irrelevant and disappointing it can be.

Still, I can't tell you how good it's been in Kiyomaro, whether I'm protecting a piece of equipment and drawing a few new cards, or I'm being politically-savvy against someone else's Gauntlet of Power. It's a decent card to have, and I've always found use for it in that deck. Any deck that makes tokens might find it worth while also. Then it's just a semi-bad Divination, which is bad, even in blue, but this bare-bones White. So, it's an All-Star here. There are no rules.





Anyway, try some of this tech out. Lemme know what you think.

Gear up for Saturday too. We've got Johnny Confidant, our newest member of the TGZ staff, fighting "last" on The Stack!

Until then, tell your friends about the story of a wealthy family who lost everything, and the one son who had no choice but to keep them all together.

It's Uncle-rested Land-velopment.
-UL