Saturday, April 20, 2013

The Stack #5- Mambo No. 5

Ladies and Gentlemen, we're kickin' off our version of Dragon's Maze spoilers on The Stack here in True Lou Bega style, with a Mambo No. 5 of our own for our fifth "episode."

This week and the following, we'll be talking Guild Champs, so get ready for a lot of fun and excitement. 


We've got a little bit of Exava, in your life.
A little bit of Vorel, by your side.
A Tenth of Lavinia's all you need.
A whole lotta Ruric Thar's all you see.
A little bit of Mirko Vosk, that's the plan.
Now let's get to The Stack before this is stuck in your head.

THIS IS THE STACK!

Uncle Landdrops- THUMBS UP
Had some serious debates about this card with GG, cause I love RT3 (Get it? Cause he's single-handedly saving the Gruul Franchise?). I've been sold since PAX East spoiled it. Hands down the best Gruul Commander. He has nice build-me-around space like Wort, the Raidmother, while also being the opposite of her. Also gonna be killer in my Animar deck, which is now one Domri away from being all lands and dudes.

Venser's Journalist- THUMBS UP
This is one mean ogre, and if his size and aggression don't scare you, then one of the meanest noncreature-lockdown abilities will. I think that 6 damage on anyone who plays a noncreature spell will paint a huge red target on Ruric, so you'd best come prepared with some Greaves if you want to consider using him.

Grandpa Growth- THUMBS NEUTRAL
I've been told I am a bit of a contrarian. I'd have to disagree. I am not swooning over Ruric Thar. In order to get me as excited as these guys it would have to read something like: "Haste, Trample. Ruric Thar can't be countered by spells or abilities." And the burn trigger would only hit opponents. As is, this card just seems...too fair. I am not afraid. I am still going to jam counter spells like my life depends on it. Best R/G general? Probably. Top 10 cmc 6 threat? Not really. Also: flavor. Why does an ogre barbarian guy with an axe for a hand have Vigilance? Because he has two heads? Really? I can only assume he takes rocks out of his underdeveloped brain and throws them at people who cast noncreature spells...because that makes sense.

Johnny Confidant- THUMBS UP
Not since Kazuul, Tyrant of the Cliffs have I been so excited to see such a devastating creature. Sure he has to attack each turn if able but he's got Vigilance which to me makes more than up for it. So far from what I've seen of the guild champions he's one of three to be successful as a commander and I can't wait to see how he works with Animar, Soul of Elements. Bravo!


Venser's Journalist- THUMBS UP (WAAAY UP)
This card has by far one of the most devastating enter the battlefield effects, which means that Lavinia will be buddies with Venser, the Sojourner and Conjurer's Closet. She's also one tough cookie: 4/4 for 3WU? Not bad. Add protection from red and she's not worried about burn spells or silly Ruric Thar.

Johnny Confidant- THUMBS UP
Detain was a mechanic that fit so well for Azorius in both flavor and lore. Her detain reaches everyone and targeting only 4 or lower is very devastating. Think about how many 4 cmc cards that make decks better, just off the top of my head I can think of Sensei's Top, a bunch of Mana dorks, Birthing Pod and Mana Rocks.

Uncle Landdrops- THUMBS UP
Of the Azorius Commanders, this is probably the one with the best space for design that isn't Geist. Blink-vinia puts soft locks on tokens and many other low CMC generals, and can also pose quite a threat herself. She's the leading leader of UW legends. No need to put her in deck. Lead with the Tenth!

Grandpa Growth-  THUMBS UP (THE MAXIMUM POSSIBLE WAY UP)
Ruric Thar? Cheesy scrub nonsense. Lavinia? The real noodles. Mechanically, this card is absurd. Totally snapped. I don't know why they print stuff like this, but they do. It creates non-interactive game play. This is the anti-fun. So naturally I love it. But, let us speak on the flavor of this tasty beast. She Detains all the people, but she is just one person. This card should be a swat team...or Batman.


Uncle Landdrops- THUMBS UP
At first glance, "Eczema" here doesn't look like she'd be much help to the Rakdos beatdown clan. However, considering the fact that RB houses mechanics like Undying, Devour, and Bloodthirst in addition to Unleash, this Witch isn't quite so useless, even if she's just a glorified Fervor for Ashling the Pilgrim, Bobby-Nixilis, or Black Mike and friends. This deck might be all-in on the red zone strategy, but I have confidence this deck can be made well. Also, a good supporter legend.

Venser's Journalist- THUMBS UP
I feel like Wizards really captured the essence of Rakdos. Alone, she's a formidable threat, since she's basically a 4/4 first strike, haste for four. Her other ability works well with other Rakdos unleashers, but also with creatures that just happen to have counters on them. Stick this in your Kresh the Bloodbraided deck and smoke it.

Johnny Confidant- THUMBS DOWN
I was disappointed when I read her abilities and they didn't quite match-up to who she is in the book, Ruric Thar did with his Non-creature spell trigger and for a Blood Witch with swords that are able to cut through chains... Eh it's all kinda personal I suppose. I just wanted some kind of damage spell built in similar to Guttersnipe, only Legendary. Honestly and from an unbiased position I'll say that while she will make creatures entering with +1/+1 counters on them have Haste the list of creatures that share Red or Black without Undying are slim. Golgari's got Scavenge so Jund seems a good choice, but that leaves only that and Devour. I'm just not seeing where she would give a good advantage. Stick with Fervor.

Grandpa Growth- THUMBS DOWN
This is...cute. Why is it that BR always gets stuck with the short end of the cycle stick? This card is so fair that it hurts. It also isn't very creative. "Oh, Rakdos champion, I know! Give it Haste! Unleash! NAILED IT!"


Grandpa Growth- THUMBS UP
I like it when cards are original designs, or at least close enough to original that it isn't over done yet. Everyone wanted a legendary Gilder Bairn, right? I think that's a cool design space they should use on more classic cards. General-ify it or whatever. I'm glad they made it. Not glad they nerfed it.

Johnny Confidant- THUMBS UP
A few Generals that come to mind that also care about counters are; Animar, Soul of Elements, Vorosh, the Hunter, The Mimeoplasm, Experiment Kraj and Jenara, Asura of War. Each casting of Vorosh, Kraj and Mimeo are investments that want to maximize counter potential and this guy is the utility master for them.  Unfortunately he was dialed back from my pal Gilder Bairn but I think he still has potential.

Uncle Landdrops- THUMBS DOWN (For Now)
VJ and I talked about "Jor-El," and I just think WotC left him metaphorically on Krypton when it exploded into a million pieces. What I mean is that the design had to be powered-down for Planeswalkers (and a shrouded Helix Pinnacle, probs) to prevent it from being a better Gilder Bairn and a complement to Doubling Season, so it ended up being overthought in the rules text, ruining for me what is aesthetically a rather beautiful card. Human Merfolk sounds awesome. I might eventually play it, but he's just no Superman.

Venser's Journalist- NOT SURE
I want to make this card work; I really do. It'd be shameful to have such a pretty card be so limited. UL's right, though; his limited scope leaves him only useful with Grafting or Evolve. I'd still give him a shot, though, assuming you can build an entirely graft/evolve EDH deck.


Johnny Confidant- THUMBS -> FACEPALM
The Dimir mechanic "Cipher" was a let down for me, especially since Transmute was great and didn't need any additional help to make it work. Transmute captured Dimir perfectly as a guild with the most interaction with the library that would sit back, gather the pieces, then strike when time was right. Cypher turns this behind-the-scenes guild by giving it a combative effect. Understanding that making it say "..combat damage..." loweres the power of the effect by making something that needs outside help with evasion. For 3UB just cast Consuming Aberration.

Venser's Journalist- NOT SURE
Normally, getting a Mind Funeral every turn would make me squeal with delight, but Mirko seems like a bit more of a liability. A 2/4 for five already has me in question, but the fact that he'll have to be heavily protected and made unblockable for a slightly better Mind Funeral really puts me on the fence.

Grandpa Growth- THUMBS DOWN
I don't understand why development does this kind of stuff. I would be excited to try this card at 1UB (think about Kemba). I would consider it a fair deal at 2UB, but a fair creature doesn't usually win games. At 3UB, this isn't a card at all. The obvious answer is that they had to make it fair for: <insert silly format here>! Probably limited. Let's be honest though. It wouldn't be much different at cmc 3 or cmc 7 in limited. They either kill it or lose. Pretty simple. The awkward thing about this is that increasing its costs actually increases its power level. Casting more expensive cards means more lands out on the table. Which means less time to stabilize before you lose to the Mirk-fiend.

Uncle Landdrops- THUMBS DOWN
He's not as bad as UB Legends have been, but Lazav is still my clear favorite for a serious Dimir deck. I just prefer Doom Blades over Millsville. Still, Mirko Polo does look like a siginificantly better option than Szadek, who's always been a better support card anyway. Mirko's also a great No.2 for Lazav as well. Flavor Judge says, "Yiss..." I just don't see myself playing this guy either.

Obviously, next week will be Teysa, Tajic, Emmara, Melek, and Varolz, which I'm sure will be a pretty decent outing.

In the meantime, we've got some stuff on the way for you here on TGZ. Grandpa Growth's "In General" Series returns tomorrow with more theory, and Johnny C's gonna talk Melek and Riku Thursday as part of his new "Tops Down//Bottom's Up" series.

Until then, Cast Your Solemns, Play Your Lands, and Take Friendly Mulligans.
Not That Partial Paris Nonsense.

-UL



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