Saturday, December 14, 2013

The Stack #38- Planeswalker, Texas Ranger

Hey Zoners! GG here, today we have a stack about everyone's favorite card type: Planeswalkers.

Most of the discussion about pdubs centers around how powerful they are or what their place is in format X, blah blah blah. There are only a few Chuck Norris-level walkers, and we all know who they are, what they look like, and their undeniable loyalty.



Today, we're gonna talk about the Planeswalkers that don't get too much love on the regular. Maybe their PR guys are lazy, maybe they're super niche hipsters (cough Nissa Revane cough), but the gang's all here, and ready to sing for the common walkers of the multiverse. So let's get to it.

THIS IS THE STACK!!!

VENSER'S JOURNALIST'S PICK


Venser's Journalist- THUMBS DOWN
In Shards of Alara, Sarkhan Vol was a pretty cool dude. He beefed up and hastened your creatures, provided an Act of Treason engine, and could net you five dragons. In Zendikar block, he truly became mad, which to me is maddening.

Many humans tend to dislike what they cannot understand. And sadly, I am no exception to this generality, at least in this scenario. I am giving Sarkhan part deux a thumbs down because I don't understand this card at all. He has no way to increase his counters (unless you're doing some proliferating), his trade-creature-with-dragon move is quite baffling (unless you have a deck that runs on sacrifice), and his final dragon power move requires that you have a good number of dragons to begin with (once again, very deck specific).

In other words, when Wizards designed this card, they created something so niche that I have no way of seeing a deck that can utilize all three of his moves in a sensible fashion. And to me, a planeswalker should not have throw away moves; they are meant to be awesome and their abilities should reflect sensible design. I am accusing Wizards of committing the imitative fallacy on this one: just because Sarkhan went to the dark side doesn't mean his abilities should also take a turn for the worse.

Grandpa Growth- THUMBS UP
Shocker: I actually play this card in my Nicol Bolas no creature gimmick deck. With a moderate level of library manipulation you can continually {0} him for several turns, which is better than expected value for many planeswalkers. The lack of a true ultimate is somewhat annoying, but I have stolen games using this to essentially get in an extra hit with Nicol Bolas. Not a great card by any stretch of the imagination, but not everything is Jace TMS.

To address VJ's points: This card's design was heavily driven by flavor, rather than a delusion of constructed playability. The idea behind having no loyalty gaining ability and no ultimate help convey the theme that he is descending further into madness as he approaches his inevitable defeat, which comes at the hands of Jace and Chandra in the story. If I recall correctly, Nicol Bolas had mentally dominated Sarkhan and placed him at the Eye of Ugin to prevent anyone from releasing the Eldrazi, but in a seemingly random twist of fate Chandra defeats Sarkhan and accidently unleashed the Eldrazi only by using a Ghostfire spell, which shares the peculiar colorless nature of the world-eating spaghetti monsters. Now, cards like this don't always become fan favorites in terms of game play or nostalgia, but a certain amount of them are required to create some semblance of a coherent storyline within the magic world. It can be a bummer when you open up a mythic rare that is somewhat junky like this, but I opened more than one in Swiss drafts during the Rise of the Eldrazi limited season and was not at all displeased.

Johnny Confidant- THUMBS UP
R/B is not a color combination I've really played around with so I have not had the chance to play with this Sarkhan variant. I have however been on the wrong end of his {-4} and in a 5-color Scion deck that pumped out dragons like nobody's business let's just say that it really hurts.

I understand that he gets a lot of grief being the only planeswalker that does not add counters, but in EDH decks people tend to play recursion so going to the graveyard quickly isn't a big problem. Also his high starting loyalty works well with Doubling Season.

Uncle Landdrops-  THUMBS UP
GG addresses most of VJ's issues with this card. I too have played this card in a couple different decks, and I liked it a lot. I was skeptical the first time I played him, but discovered his abilities are a lot more useful than advertised. Hitting lands is basically a free card in a tight spot and transforming Eldrazi Spawn into 5/5's was one of the best values I ever got out of ability 2. Is it challenging to build around? Sort of. But Dragons are a bigger part of the EDH architecture, so it's really not much more of a stretch if you're already making a commitment to tribal or, as GG does, to the Supreme Overlord of Evil in his creatureless brew.

GRANDPA GROWTH'S PICK


Grandpa Growth- THUMBS DOWN
I see a lot of this in Sharuum decks and cannot recommend that people play it, but my story about this card isn't about Commander. I was on a leave of absence during the Scars of Mirrodin/Mirrodin Besieged limited environment and I used up most of my free time playing drafts on MTGO. I racked up a ton of ELO points playing this format. I started off very modestly too; I promised myself I wouldn't go bankrupt playing Modo, but luckily I went for more than a month of free drafting through a combination of opening up a half dozen or so copies of this card, which at the time of its release was trading for about 40 tickets, and crushing cues (a related phenomenon). I am 100% sure I have won more Scars drafts than I have drafts of my own Pauper cube....and yes Dinosaurs was my favorite archetype, thanks for asking.

I translated that immense pile of packs and tickets into online Pauper decks and that was a genius decision because Pauper is awesome and if I hadn't been the master of lucking out opening packs I never would have found that out. I even opened a paper copy of this which I traded for a Karakas, you can check the current prices of these two cards to determine whether or not that was a sound financial decision.

Johnny Confidant- THUMBS DOWN
Worse in comparison with his first version. Honestly I don't see how mixing in Exsanguinate, lead the stampede, and Animate Artifact works with artifact flavor, but whatever makes evil Tezzi happy I guess.

Venser's Journalist- THUMBS UP
I enjoy seeing this card in action, though I admit I prefer Tezzeret the Seeker. I think with Tezz 2, the abilities are a bit more offensive, and he can lend a great deal of help to people with artifact heavy decks that are low in the creature department.

The card has its limitations. Any time you're forced to put cards on the bottom of your library, there is always the chance you'll tuck away some instant or sorcery that could have been a huge advantage. However, that doesn't make him any less useful in a Sharuum deck. Maybe not the best option, but still a good option.

Uncle Landdrops- THUMBS DOWN
I'm not a big fan of the abilities here. I agree with GG, in that it's a card people play for fashion not function in Commander. I don't entirely dislike this card, but when there isn't even the tiniest glimmer of value, or even synergy/redundancy with other cards, I have no incentive to even try it out. And I'm game for a lot of different sketchy cards.

JOHNNY CONFIDANT'S PICK

Johnny Confidant-  THUMBS UP
Call me a fanboy, a follower, or a conformist, but I'm a fan of Party Jace.

Of his variants I think this has to be the least threatening of them all and most fun. I mean, whats not to like? Everyone gets card draw for +2 and it costs 1 to be selfish. Don't look at his -10, it's no mind sculpt. Every time I see him I get happy for card draw!

I've collected all of the Jace's cept for this one. For some reason I cannot get my hands on one via trade. The reason I must trade for him is to complete the four basic ways of acquiring cards: trade, buy, open, and gift. I bought Architect of Thought, opened Memory Adept, and was gifted Mind Sculptor (FTV:20), so all I got left is trade!

Uncle Landdrops- THUMBS UP
I've played this card, and love it. I actually pulled one of these in an m10 half-booster pack when I first started playing. I'm not really attached to the obsession that has happened ever since he became more than Buddy Jace here, but I do see the appeal of Mind Sculpting. Even Sub Sculpting.

Grandpa Growth - THUMBS DOWN
I have played this, but don't recommend playing it. I have been on a crusade for a couple years now to try and convince the world that this card is just straight up worse than Divination. I will explain:

In competitive games, close games, Divination doesn't do anything to stabilize the board so you get to draw your two cards, but you usually end up taking another hit that turn. Jace comes down and draws you a card and then gets attacked. So in actuality here are our two options: Draw two cards and lose some life OR draw one card and not lose life. In the physical universe that I occupy drawing more cards is better than drawing less cards basically anyway you slice it and Jace B just doesn't draw you enough cards. Which, when you consider the fact that it literally doesn't do anything else means you don't really want to play this. Compulsive Research will draw you more cards. Thirst For Knowledge is an instant. Brainstorm exists. Please stop; if not for me then do it for yourself. To address the inevitable counterpoint: "Having the planeswalker is better on an empty board." A ham sandwich looks good on an empty table too. That doesn't make ham sandwich better than steak tartare.


Venser's Journalist- THUMBS UP
I'll agree he is the least threatening Jace, but for my uses, he's also the shortest lived. Despite people loving to draw cards, not everyone in my playgroup is so convinced that Jace should stick around long, so his -1 ability is what I use more of. Either way, I'd have only gotten three turns of Jace B on the field.

Still, much better than Architect of Thought in my books!


UNCLE LANDDROPS' PICK 

El-speth. Oh-Ah-Ah!
Fighter of the Hydra, Oh-Ah-Ah!
Champion of the Sun...
Uncle Landdrops- THUMBS UP
I haven't activated her ultimate yet, but this Champion of the Sun is truly a master of karate and friendship for everyone. My Lin Sivvi deck is home to a host of Rebel weenies that reap huge amounts of value off her abilities, which scale well in multiplayer. In fact, it almost ensures Elspeth has at least one turn to survive, which is crazy when you consider most P-Dubs get hated off the table almost immediately, regardless of how many players are in the game.

Johnny Confidant- THUMBS UP
(Always Sunny reference received) I've been impressed with this version of Elsepth. Most planeswalkers have a survival ability like burn, power reduction, or deathtouch. Elspeth, "the third time around" creates 3 defenders that (for commander especially) can survive every turn while you work your way to that delicious emblem.

I love Planeswalkers that have synergy within themselves. Creating creatures that want to be given flying and +2/+2. And I love her Intrepid Hero inspired {-3}. She's the complete package in my eyes, protection, powerful ultimate, and threat removal.

Grandpa Growth- THUMBS UP
I haven't maindecked this anywhere yet. It is hot tech, and I am on board, but I haven't been blown away. It occupies a very similar spot as Martial Coup. It is usually cheaper too, which is nice, but the tokens come in increments. It isn't strange for this to make more tokens than a big Coup, but they don't all get to immediately the next turn so the follow-up beatdowns are less likely to get a kill. I am sure White decks want this, but it is a replaceable piece of the metagame puzzle.

Venser's Journalist- THUMBS UP
The thing about Elspeth is that there isn't really a bad version of her. Granted the Scars of Mirrodin Elspeth is nowhere near the awesomeness of Knight-Errant, gaining life and sweeping the board is pretty awesome.

With Elspeth Sun's Champion, I feel like Wizards only amped up her playability, because now she provides a great token generator and slays the monstrous. The emblem is really more of a bonus feature anyhow, because her first two abilities are rock solid as is.

Interestingly enough, each version has progressively tacked on 1 to the CMC... MTG Inflation?

That's all we got for today.

Until next time, remember that there's no situation a good roundhouse kick can't fix.

-UL/GG/VJ/JC

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