UL's M15 Loot

Amidst all the great M15-related stuff GG's been doing the last couple weeks, I decided to hold off on talking about the set until I got my hot stack of nonsense in the mail, which arrived yesterday. So it's time to take off our serious, awesome Grandpa-Growth-analysis hats, and put on our silly, "why-in-the-world-is-Landdrops playing this" ones. Maybe that puts a little excitement in your belly. Maybe you think me saying that is stupid, and my ideas are worse. I wouldn't disagree, but this is the Crazy Train, and we all know that the only direction it goes is "off the rails."

BLUE

At the top of the order is Quickling. 

What can I say? I'm a total sucker for Evasion, Flash, and protecting my stuff. I play Whitemane Lion, Faerie Impostor, Stonecloaker, and Dust Elemental, and so there's nothing that's going to stop me from continuing my silly penchant- especially when it comes in both Faerie AND Rogue form. I heart Rogues.

I got two copies, and I can't decide which decks would be the best fits. I really like it, I think I just need more. Maybe even a foil one. This art isn't great, but I think foiling could improve it. 

I'm surprised GG missed the glaring opportunity to Pop Culture blast you in the face, and I'm not going to strike out on the same pitch:

What if I say it's not like the others?
What if I say it's not just another one in your place? 

What if I say Wizards will never surrender when it comes to making clones? What if I say I'm happy about that? 

Foo Fighting Rhetoric aside- Mercurial Pretender is sweet. I don't need more Clones, but the slightness of upgrade is so enticing there's no way I'm going to say no. While it's really only as exciting as being a Mac user and going from the Leopard OS X to Snow Leopard, or from iPhone 5c to 5s, it's still enough to want to queue up the Internet's oldest Dancing Baby, and throw a small party for yourself.

OTHER BLUE CARDS I PICKED UP:

Polymorphist's Jest- Because should the day arise when I'm done playing Magic, I don't want to look back and be the guy that never turned another dude's guys into Frogs.

Aetherspouts- I like subgames. This presents one of the most interesting ones I've ever seen.

Kapsho Kitefins- I've been looking for cards to make a non-rare Animar decklist, and I think this looked pretty tasty. Having flying, I can also slot it into this basic Isperia the Inscrutable deck I've been working on, or even into Thassa.

Void Snare- Got two copies. Not sure if I'll play both, but for one blue, even at Sorcery speed, it's gotta be borderline playable, right?

Military Intelligence- One of my newer decks, Thassa, loves devotion, drawing cards, and it's cool to have a draw trigger when I attack. Not particularly an instant slam dunk, but I'm trying it out.

Glacial Crasher- Just another weird Pauper card I thought would slot nicely into Animar. 

GREEN

Perhaps Genesis Hydra is a slightly more purposive reason to dance like dial-up and AOL are still relevant, so I've kept it close in case for extra dancing time. 

Let me start off by saying I share GG's feelings of being annoyed by Hydras. When they were talking about Theros at last year's Comic-Con, Rosewater said that he was happy they'd finally found a creature type for all the colors, the last being Hydra.

In the last couple years, I've never seen more Hydras in my life. Some times I feel like I'm back in Ancient Greece, where you couldn't walk 5 feet into Athens without having to face a damn Hydra. They're like the 7-Eleven of mythology, now they've invaded Magic, and I'm not thrilled by this.

However, I do like what Genesis Hydra does. I like that its flavor matches up with a card we Green players have all beaten to death in Genesis Wave, and that it produces a kind of card advantage Green players might not get, in that it can cast a noncreature, nonpermanent spell as a result of its ability. I'm keen to try this. Looks like fun.

OTHER GREEN CARDS I PICKED UP

Reclamation Sage- Because duh. This is the biggest no-brainer in its color.

Kalonian Twingrove- Had a nice debate about this card with GG if you read the comments on Threats, Part I. Personally, I think this card is bonkers in mono-Green, but I also play a crap-ton of forests and ramp for days. This scales favorably with my plans, and could be a nice Commander Doppelganger when Silvos isn't out beating face. I've added a nice token package to it, and this is on theme there.

Shaman of Spring- It was green, it said draw a card, I couldn't resist. 

RED

Objectively, this card is as dumb as Grandpa thinks it is. 

Still, I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to play Ronald Reagan's favorite Magic card, or to say stupid things like, "Mr. Gorba-Dragon, Tear Down These Walls!"

Doctors maintain they still don't know what's wrong with me. Healthy people wouldn't say things like this, and they surely wouldn't be playing Magic cards like this, but I'm obviously neither of these things.

When Siege Dragon got spoiled, I wasn't so focused on the ETB trigger as much as I was his attack trigger, which goes great with Basilisk Collar and Loxodon Warhammer- things I play in HH. I also liked the idea of playing this in Animar, where he helps my like 2 and 3-drops to trade with mid-range guys. So I got one.

I want to Reagan Smash with Siege Dragon. And if I can sell you on this card, then I should use this as part of my application package I send to Wizards.

OTHER RED CARDS I PICKED UP

Act on Impulse- It's a secret that long ago they printed a card named Three Wishes in Visions that did the same thing for 1UU and was an Instant. Why this couldn't be as powerful, I have no idea, but I thought it was worth a look. I play a lot of garbage cards in HH, and I don't mind the extra dig or pitching it to another discard/draw spell.

Chandra, Pyromaster- This has been a ridiculously expensive card for a long time- at least, more than I want o pay for one. I'm happy to have waited, and I can't wait to see if her "Exile the top card of Library" effect is any good in Commander either.

BLACK

Other than Soul of Innistrad and Soul of New Phyrexia, I wasn't excited at all for the rest of the cycle. Well, I was excited about the blue one until I realized it was color based, not "quantity of color" based.

GG compared this to Grave Titan, and so did the rest of the Internet, and Soul of Innistrad is clearly not better. However, that was never going to be a "fair" fight to begin with.

Personally, a more accurate comparison for Soul is Theros' Champion of Stray Souls. While Champion provides a nifty little Graveyard Blink, Soul is going to be a little slower, but it's also bigger, will trade with bigger stuff, and gives you the opportunity in the long term for aggressive expansion.

I definitely think this is a card that wants to be played in big mana mono-black, and other graveyard/sacrifice based decks, which goes give it more of a label than the do-it-all Grave Titan. That doesn't make it worse necessarily, but I have a feeling we are never going to get the kind of power that those Titans had ever again.

I love this card. I didn't think I would throughout the creation and voting process, but I'm sold.

This is a card I ordered post pre-release because I was hoping the price might drive it down, but with another year of Thoughtseize in standard, we're looking at a card that makes value out of late-game Thoughtseize.

It's sweet, and it's immediately going into Greel.

OTHER BLACK CARDS I PICKED UP

Eternal Thirst- This is probably going to be the card I regret picking up from the set, but whatever. It's a rinky-dink ten-cent enchantment that gives black creatures lifelink and a +1/+1 counter whenever a creature dies. I liked the idea of comboing with Crypt Rats so much I thought it'd be worth it, but it's probably not.

WHITE

Like Magister Sphinx, I have a feeling Resolute Archangel is going to agitate kitchen tables everywhere. In cases like this, I feel pretty justified in being the first to do it.

Resolute Archangel is dangerously powerful. If you manage your life total correctly, and you play her in the danger zone, there's no doubt you should be gaining over 25 life when you cast this 4/4. Again, insane value when you think the next best life gain card is Beacon of Immortality. This severely outclasses it, and it can be blinked and bounced to your hand.

I think the future is going to go 1 of 2 ways. Either Archangel is going to get banned by the EDHRC, or we're going to see more cards with this rules text. Either way, I'm down.

OTHER WHITE CARDS I PICKED UP:

Hushwing Gryff- It felt silly not to. I've been griping about getting more copies of Torpor Orb for a while, because I want to see what happens when we have quality answers to ETB triggers. This is certainly a quality answer. Gryff is basically an ETB counterspell.

Return to the Ranks- Whenever GG says that a card is going to hold its monetary value, I listen. He's my Magic Stockbroker, if there ever was a thing. RttR is something I knew I'd like in both my mono-White decks from a playability standpoint, but I wanted to have a back door plan for getting rid of it if it didn't make the cut. It's not as profitable as I'd want, but I have a feeling Craig Wescoe's White Weenies in Modern are going to be totes ridiculous at the next Pro Tour.

Ephemeral Shields- Convoke and a cheap casting cost gives a creature the opportunity to be a free counterspell on a Doom Blade. Another suspect purchase, but if I keep them in that dime-to-quarter range, I think I'll be able to sleep at night.

COLORLESS

Sorry Miss Jackson's of the World- This card is fo' Real.

And yes, it's made to make your daughter cry. And no I won't apologize a trillion times for playing it.

I think SoNP is easily the best of the cycle, not only because it slots into every deck, but because it provides each deck with another 6/6 for 6 threat with Trample. It's the Temple Bell of Creatures. I don't see any reason not to be considering this, especially when he protects your stuff.

Naturally, this card has been powered down because everyone and their mother is playing Deglamer/Unravel the Aether/Return To Dust which fortifies the Path/Swords removal core that already existed in most decks. Even so, there is still such a small quantity of cards that hose Soul that I doubt we'll be playing much longer without seeing two or three of this guy coming out to play.

Additionally, I love Daarken's artwork on this one. It's like he got together with the people who designed the Transformer graphics and asked himself, "What would Elesh Norn and Wurmcoil Engine look like if they had a Transformer baby?"

The last card worthy of a picture is possibly the funniest card I've seen printed in a long time.

Seldom do cards combine flavor, silliness, and somewhat awkward, unorthodox power to create a fresh, unique offering to our game.

Despite this card being very nonsensical, it makes me happy to see. Another set, another new target for Trinket Mages everywhere.

OTHER COLORLESS CARDS I PICKED UP:

Rogue's Gloves- The 2/2 Pay/Equip ratio might be a little too fair for this design, but it says Draw a Card, so why not give it a spin?

Radiant Fountain- Not much, but I still liked it enough to get copies. Card draw isn't my only favorite. I also love Land.

Well, that's my list. What cards are you most excited about? Be sure to include them in the comments below.

Pass Turn.
-UL

M15 Set Review: Threats Part Two

Hello and welcome back to The General Zone's set review for Magic M15. I am your guide, Grandpa Growth, and today we are getting back on the horse to finish up our look at the threat cards.

You can find the previous part of this article here: Threats Part One.

Today we are beginning right where we left off, with Red cards, and then finishing with some juicy Artifact Creatures.

So they press fit a Goblin Piledriver onto a Goblin Assault. I can dig that. With the notable exception of Protection from Blue, this has pretty much everything those cards had and, to be honest, those cards are surprisingly strong. A 2/2 is very easy to get rid of in Commander, but forcing your opponent to use precious removal on your early plays can clear a path for your haymakers to stick later in the game. Every deck needs a certain percentage of these medium impact, cheap plays, in order to be successful. Rabblemaster can fit that role nicely.

I am just glad that there is so much text on this card that they didn't have room print an idiotic joke.



At some point, marketing communicated to design that the customer base liked dragons. Since then they have printed a dragon in just about every set. Nowadays, when I look at a spoiler for a new set, I am not thinking: 'Oh wow, look at this awesome new dragon.' Instead I am thinking: 'Oh lord what abominable fan service have they had then unenviable obligation of printing this time.'

This dragon hoses walls. Not that anyone cares. There are many wall Creatures and maybe five are playable in Commander. Save me the trouble of ridiculing you and just never play this. I have only included it in the review because I want to mention the design decision that goes into printing something like walls.

For years design had been moving away from the subtype wall because, well let's be honest they don't make any sense. If it is a wall it isn't a creature. Even if it were some sort of living wall, it then isn't really a wall, it is just a strangely shaped creature. The Defender ability essentially renders the identity of walls obsolete while also opening of the creative space that they can occupy in terms of creature type and as story elements. I realize that Aaron Forsythe is the head of the R&D department for Magic and that he can essentially do what he wants, but...why do this? Why regress the game to an objectively less refined state by reversing previously established decisions.

Many cards have referenced Shandalar. There was even an old point and click style Magic game that took place on Shandalar. It is safe to say I have received enough disparate information about this place that I don't really know what it looks like. Is there ever going to be a block set there? Probably. Do I have any idea what this place looks like? No. There has been no presentation of a consistent thematic or flavor identity, just bits and pieces. This card makes me think that it is a place I am not excited to go. Mostly because it is horribly weak, not so much because of the lightning and such. Starfall just got printed in Journey into Nyx and EVERYONE hated it. It was nigh unplayable in draft. Why would anyone want a walking Starfall factory?

Sure, this card's effect is substantially better than Starfall, but still. It conjures up an all-to-familiar image of poor cost/effect balance. I would say that this is the weakest in the cycle if not for the fact that it DIRECTLY counters and consumes the Soul of Zendikar's ability. Tragic.


Geroge Fan of Plants vs. Zombies fame brings us, what else, a plant. Why is it a plant? Arbitrary creative. Why is it a hydra? Well, do you remember what I said earlier about dragons?

Mechanically, this card is very powerful. Getting stuff for free is an easy way to take over the game. It calls back to some very excellent cards like Thicket Elemental and Maelstrom Wanderer. Expect to see a lot of this at the Commander tables. It will have massive fan appeal for a short time after it is released, but then will likely fade away to some extent.




Of all the spiritual predecessors that this card has, only one ever saw any play at all in Commander: Dungrove Elder. Why do these cards consistently under-perform? It is simple. As I have said many times before, if all your threat does is damage, that isn't enough. It doesn't matter how big it gets. It doesn't matter that you get two of them. If it is going to cost six mana it needs to generate card advantage. That is it.

I sometimes get asked, why does mono Green struggle, while mono Black thrives? On the surface it looks like Green has the better cards. The trouble is that 'swamps matter' cards are better than 'forests matter' cards. The proof is in the pudding. If you are going to be mono Green, you need a stronger incentive than this.



Previous Nissa was a stone blank in Commander...and pretty much every other format. This card, however, is hot. It hits hard, making a 4/4 every turn is going to put your opponent under lots of pressure and allows you to effectively defend your planeswalker while you take the long journey up to seven loyalty. On the other hand, four is a big chunk of mana. Sure you can only untap forests, but I can think of some pretty good forests. Bayou and Tropical Island come to mind. This is going directly into several of my Green EDH decks, where I expect it to stay until something truly broken gets printed to replace it.


This is very comparable to Liliana of the Dark Realms and Garruk Wildspeaker, two of my favorite planeswalkers. In terms of mana generation, this is just about the most value you are ever going to get.


It is a plant that comes back to life! The dev team must have all gotten free copies of Plants vs. Zombies 2. I dig that it resists most mass removal. I can even dig that it has more power than it's cost so it can trade across with just about anything. However, it is a big bummer than they can take this 'titan' out of commission for a full turn cycle using just about anything they have laying around the house. If this got into a fight with a ham sandwich it would be a tie. That is kind of sad.

Someone needs to inform the creative team at Wizards that fungi aren't plants. This is like saying crabs are walnuts because they have a hard shell. Also, if this is supposed to give me the idea that an entire ecosystem is just an extension of one organism, this card should be legendary. If they are all part of the same thing, could there ever really be more than 'one' of them?


Reach has always been something of a throwaway ability to me. It adds some value to Creatures that need a boost, but it isn't anything substantial. I have never said: 'Oh no! You're guy has Reach?! Now my Akroma does nothing!!!' But heck man, it makes 3/3s. A walking Centaur Glade is pretty sweet.

Hands down the worst piece of art in the set. Possibly the worst piece of art to make it into a core set since the M10 reboot. I vastly prefer the promo art, which more clearly shows the hedrons on the beast's back...and isn't an arachnid.




This is very reminiscent of Nicol Bolas, planeswalker. It provides an immediate answer to opposing pdubs and generates value even if they don't have one. It can also answer opposing Creatures and provide you threats of your own. This has a much more multiplayer friendly ultimate, but it is still only useful against one player. That is fine, I am simply pointing out that this and Nicol Bolas both share then weakness of having their ultimate essentially kill one player, but not necessarily win the game. Like the other expensive planeswalkers, and planeswalkers in general, this card is well positioned in Commander and will see a great deal of play.

So I was under the impression that, when Garruk got cursed by the power of the Chain Veil, that...ya know, it was a bad thing! Apparently it just turns you into a hulking master badass. I would like to sign up for this kind of therapy.



Well if Soul of Zendikar had the worst art, this thing has the worst name. You see, scuttle is a verb yes, but it is something that you do to ships. It is not how I imagine our terrifying robot overlords getting around.

A remarkably bland colorless threat that can't be chump blocked and is weak to exiling removal? I am not sure that there is enough room in the format for a worse Wurmcoil Engine. Did I say worse? I meant terrible.




The final installment of the Soul cycle and the final card for this article, Soul of New Phyrexia offers something old to a new market. Avacyn, Angel of Hope gave the power of unlimited indestructibility to White. Now, for a somewhat inconvenient price, every color can have this privilege.

This card will see a lot of play. More than it should. It isn't that good, but players are wary of board sweepers in Commander; with good reason. This will give other colors, mainly Green and Red, a way to work around Wrath of God while still advancing their plan of smashing face. That is good enough for me.

I have trouble seeing this cycle really getting off the ground. Their activated abilities are so expensive that it isn't feasible for you to cast and activate them in the same turn. If you had that much mana you could be doing MUCH more powerful things. I would guess that most of the time this cards net effect will just be making your opponent discard two removal spells. So it is basically just a worse Mind Rot, right?

That's all for this segment. Thanks for sticking with us through a longer-than-average set review, but remember that we still have more to come. Check back later this week for answers, legends, and utility cards. As always, leave you feedback in the comments and I will see you next time.

-GG